The "mommy" days are here

From Max

2012-02-02T22:38:00.002-06:00

This is just because I don't want to forget it. And I might be starting to feel a tiny bit of inspiration to recover my lost pictures and start blogging again.

Tonight when I was tucking Max into bed, I found his Nintendo DS under the covers.

Me: Max, did you sneak this into your room?
Max: Yes.
Me: What were you going to do with it?
Max: I was going to get it out and play it as soon as you were not around.

LOL. I LOVE the age when kids have the complete inability to lie. Sweet innocence.

It's been a while

2012-01-17T23:39:00.001-06:00

I haven't written in a while. As you can see, ALL of the pictures from my blog are missing. A while back, there was a technical difficulty that resulted in the loss (non-recoverable) of ALL pictures from the beginning of this blog 10 years ago. It was a sad day. I am married to the King of Technology, and he did find a way that we can manually retrieve all of the pictures. It will take me hours...possibly even years. I think I am going to pick out the best posts and dig up the pictures for those and delete everything else.

Since that happened I have not been of the mind-set to blog even one time. If I could go back and do things differently, I would, but there is no use dwelling on what I can't change. So, onward and upward I go. After all, children survived long before there were scrapbooks and cameras, and mine will be fine, too (even if their every move and milestone is not documented)!

Revelation

2011-10-30T00:32:00.002-05:00

I just had this major revelation! Well, maybe it's been a long time in coming, but I was finally able to put it into words today. In the past I have been known to have insecurities about my photography (I should clarify that I have insecurities about a lot of stuff, most of which I cover up by being loud and boisterous, but photography is a major one). I would always compare myself to others, and then try to model after them. It was dis-heartening to be "just another chic with a digital camera." And then I realized (finally) that I don't excel at taking certain types of photos because I do not enjoy that particular variety of photography. When I first started, I called my business "Capture the Moment" and I still love the name. I called it that because I was passionate about getting "real-life shots" of people in their natural environments. And for some reason, over the years I have been trying to model after other (GREAT) photographers but I just wasn't getting it. And then I realized that I AM NOT THEM! Whew, what a relief! Seriously. I thought I was flawed or tainted or untrained. But in reality, I just hadn't focused on my corner, my love and my passion.

Do you know how I finally realized this? I took my boys out for a photo-shoot this weekend and I was going through the pictures and set my favorites aside. They were all pictures of my boys being "my boys" and none of the super-posed pictures even made it into my top 20. I look at the pictures I chose I and I can picture each one of my boys in the exact mood they were in, with an expression that is completely unique to them. And they were just being kids. They were the photos I took "after" our session. They are pictures of how I always want to remember them.

Waking up and realizing that I am who I am and what I do does not actually have any bearing on who I am (a daughter of a mighty KING!) is more freeing than I could have ever imagined. And oddly enough, realizing that has opened up the door to a whole new realm of photography. I have to say that this has been my best season, even though I have hardly posted any of sessions I have taken. I used to post my sessions so I could get feedback (and yes, I was always looking for positive feedback to validate my value as a photographer and a person and when I didn't get it, I would go crashing down) and for the first time ever, I felt released from the pressure of needing to know what people think about my work (and that they LIKE what I do) and I just want to do it because I love it.

Thank-you God, for your battering ram of revelation! And for three beautiful little boys who are full of the most life in the "un-posed" moments.

Look at them rolls...

2011-09-15T17:44:00.003-05:00

wordless post

2011-09-15T17:43:00.002-05:00

wordless post

2011-09-15T17:42:00.002-05:00

Who's coming to Cherry Berry?

2011-09-15T17:38:00.001-05:00

In light of my recent post, here is what we do when no one has slept and we need to get out of Dodge before something goes down. Probably wine. Down my throat. HA! We hit up Cherry Berry with friends, where, as you can tell, they are all well behaved little gentlemen. Or something like that.

Payback is wicked

2011-09-15T17:29:00.000-05:00

Txt to Brian: Why did you give me kids who never EVER take naps?
beep, beep, beep...txt from Brian: Payback

Uggh and mental head slap. I remember being a kid when my parents would make me nap. I remember that it was torture. I would lay there FOREVER not being able to sleep until finally it was time for me to get up. I hated it. I vowed I would never "punish" my kids by making them have a quiet time in the afternoon where they were bored out of their gourd and not able to sleep. Wish granted.

I have three lovely little boys and don't get me wrong...they are cute, precious and hilarious. But they don't sleep. And there are days when I step precariously close to the edge of the sanity cliff. I know now why my parents made me nap. And I also know that they could have probably cared less if I actually slept, but cared more that I stayed in my room. Heck, I should have been playing all those times instead of torturing myself by laying in bed. Okay, who am I kidding? I totally WAS playing.

There are moms out there who will say, "I just MAKE my kids nap. I need it so they HAVE to." Really? Is it possible that you just got a good napper? Or do you literally tie their doors shut and lock them from the outside so that your kids are forced to stay in their rooms? Mitchell, the dear boy has resisted naps since he was 21 months old. I kid you not. I tried everything there was to get that kid to sleep and it was a futile venture. I would lay by him, bear hug him, bribe him, sleep deprive him the night before, give him extra sleep, snacks before naps, snacks after naps, counting backwards from 100...the list goes on. He just would not sleep. I was babysitting at the time, so generally after I would wrestle with Mitchell for an hour, Max (who was an infant) would wake up followed by the boy I babysat. There was NO downtime. And there still is no down-time. I'm not going to lie. I'm tired, I have bags under my eyes the size of a trash can and my head sort of feels likes it's swimming around in this state of detachment. Michael is apparently going to follow his brother's footsteps because he sleeps roughly 1 1/2-2 hours all day long. And he's an infant! I am S-O-L.

If you don't hear from me again, just now I got buried under a mountain of housework that never got done because my children insist on NOT sleeping. If I myself could somehow go without sleep, I would be able to catch up between the hours of 10 p.m. and 6 a.m., but alas, I am old and decrepit and I must sleep (for short bursts of time between night wakings of the boys). And actually, even if I could stay awake, I'm pretty much worthless after 9:00 p.m., so I still will have mount laundry to tackle tomorrow. I sure hope we have magically clean houses in heaven...or kids that sleep like angels. Either one would be fine.

Mikey's part

2011-09-12T17:28:00.000-05:00

Mikey has to do his part of modeling for me, too. Can you believe the demands I place on these kids?

technicality

2011-09-12T17:20:00.000-05:00

Sometimes (okay, usually) when I get a new piece of equipment, I test it out on the boys. Needless to say I don't always have the kinks worked out, so pictures of my boys are not technically perfect, but usually I like their expressions or something else, so I post them anyway. It's all a learning curve! Plus, I would hate to not put a picture up that I like just because it is not technically perfect!

From the mouths of babes...

2011-09-12T17:04:00.001-05:00

Mom: Do you guys know what blood vessels are?
Max: Yeah, they are tiny like termites.

Mitchell came up behind me and scared the beejeses out of me and proudly said:
SEE! I KNEW you didn't have eyes in the back of your head. (I've told him a few times that I am always watching him and that I have eyes in the back of my head. He called my bluff. Bummer...it's a sad day every time Mom's bag o' tricks gets smaller).

Brian went downstairs and heard voices early in the morning. He poked his in their room and asked, "What's going on in here."
The boys replied, "Oh, we're just snuggling." (one day in 20 years they probably won't think that's so cute.)

Max: Boy, I sure wish I had an old cell phone to play with.
Mitchell: Don't worry, Max, in no time at all Mommy's new phone will be useless and you can have that one. (I guess they have figured out that I am rather hard on phones!)

One day after listening to a song on the radio with the lyrics don't leave me hungry for love Mitchell was singing the song around the house. But his version was: don't leave me hungry for LUNCH.
Mom: Mitchell, the words to that song are don't leave me hungry for love.
Mitchell: Yeah, mom, that's what I heard but that doesn't make any sense. Missing lunch would make me hungry. Missing love has nothing to do with hunger, so I'm singing it this way, instead." (Check and Mate...the boy has a point!)

From our food lover-
Mitchell: Man, once you start to love food, it's really hard to break the habit.

Max was saving a seat for Brian one day.
Max: I'm going to leave this space for my big ol' pal, Daddy.

Another day, Mitchell came running upstairs having a meltdown because his fort was ruined.
Me: Max, did you ruin Mitchell's fort?
Max: A monster crashed Mitchell's fort. It's not my fault if the monster's name was Max.

Me: I need to shower otherwise I'll be Staanky (stinky)
Mitchell: Stanky? I LOVE stanky womans!

Some days I feel like the boys are destroying everything. So one day I told them that.
Mitchell: We are not destroying everything. We are just destroying it one thing at a time.
(Boys-1, Mommy-0)

And now, for a couple of sweet ones.

After swimming with some friends, we were heading to the van, but Mitchell turned and asked if he could do something quick. He ran back, picked a dandelion and handed it to his little friend, Ellie. Then he got in the van and we headed home. He had the saddest look on his face and was forlornly staring out the window. I asked him what the trouble was.
Mitchell: Ellie Bosma is my BEST friend in the whole wide, world...and my heart just hurts SO much every time I have to leave her. (awww...)

Brian was recently asking Mitchell about school and his friends. Mitchell was telling them that some of the kids weren't the best of friends because they weren't loyal and didn't make the best decisions (yes, this is from my 5 year old). And that conversation was followed by,
Mitchell: I just need a good, solid friend, like Ellie Bosma.

I must say that it's entirely possible that Mitchell has his first crush on the cute little redhead girl named Ellie Bosma. And it's never just Ellie....it's always Ellie Bosma. I like her, I like her parents and it's certainly a "solid" friendship that I don't mind him having!

wordless post

2011-09-12T14:11:00.002-05:00

wordless post

2011-09-12T14:06:00.000-05:00

mmmmm....cereal

2011-09-07T22:08:00.000-05:00

Pre-School

2011-08-31T10:28:00.000-05:00

Today was Max's first day of Pre-K! He was very excited. We were waiting for his class to go and we were just taking pictures and being goofy and suddenly his class was halfway down the hall. Max looked up and said, "MOM! My class is LEAVING!" So I threw his backpack on him and we took off chasing after his class so he could catch up and I could get one last picture. Meanwhile, I just left Mikey sitting in his stroller in the cafeteria. Max did catch up with his class, but I had a lot of people ask me if I forgot Mikey. They thought I left the building and just left my 4 month old to fend for himself! Fortunately, he looks just like his brothers (who all look like their dad) so at least people would know who to bring him to if I ever did forget him!

Look at my Max! He is just so grown up!

This guy ALWAYS brings a smile to my face!

Bringing up the rear. That's kind of what you can expect when you are a kid of Denae!

The days go slow...but the years go so fast

2011-08-24T16:38:00.004-05:00

Dear Mitchell,

You are starting school and I can't go with you. I don't know where the years went, but I feel so tender inside. I see how big you are and how kind-hearted you have become.

I can't believe you wears "big-kid" shoes and when I hold your hand, it doesn't feel tiny any more. Every night when you sleep, you take up more and more of your bed. Somehow between here and there you stopped being a baby, and started being a kid.

And somehow, I really did think it would last forever, even though people warned me it wouldn't. "But you don't understand," I would say. "The days seem so long!" And they would smile and nod and say, "Yes, but the years go so fast."

Pretty soon I know the slobbery kisses will get less and less. I know there will be a time when you won't run to hug me after school is over and I know there will be a time when you realize I don't know everything you thought I did. And pretty soon there will be a time when I look at you and you will no longer be a kid, but a young man.

And you will be driving....

...and chasing girls.

I just pray that you never stop learning. And that you always have respect for those around you. I pray that you will find good friends. The kind that like you for who you are and don't care about money, or looks or popularity. Those are the kind of people who will make you stronger. More importantly, I pray that YOU are the kind of friend who doesn't care about money, looks or popularity. I pray that you will go over and talk to the kid eating glue in the corner. I hope that you hold doors open for people and respect your elders. I pray that your heart will be open and you will let all kinds of people in.

Remember how important family is. Don't forget that brothers are best friends. Even though sometimes it's hard to be the oldest when you have little brothers following you everywhere you go, I hope you can see it is a privilege. It is a responsibility to be a leader, but I know that you can do it. I pray that you will always have integrity and use your natural born leading skills in a wise way.

Jokes can be funny, but only if everyone involved thinks so! I hope that you will always be sensitive to other people's feelings and learn that just because everyone else is laughing that you don't have to, too. Try your best to include everyone. Especially the people that seem the meanest, dirtiest and those that never smile. They probably need it the most.

This is a one first of many. I am so proud of you, Mitchell.

You marched right into kindergarten like it was no big deal. I tried my best not to cry, but it didn't work. I remember how you used to cling to me like I was the last person on earth when I tried to leave you. I cried then, too. But today, when I saw how much much you have grown up and are ready to embrace new things with a vengeance, I couldn't stop the tears from rolling down my cheeks. When you climbed in the van after school and smelled like kid-sweat and were so excited because you got to have "some kind of chicken on a bun," my heart just smiled. Enjoy these days when school is fun and everyone is your friend. I can't wait to see what adventures you will go on this year, and even though I can't be with you every single minute anymore, I know that you are gaining your independence, and that is truly what you were born to do! I love you, Mitchell. Being your mom is one of my greatest blessings.

Love,
Mommy

Dear God,
Please watch over my baby today. He means so very much to me. I know I can't be with him all the time, but I know you are. Help me to let him grow and not hold him back. And thank you for sweaty-kid smells and "some kind of chicken on a bun."
Amen

6 years ago

2011-08-23T08:31:00.000-05:00

6 years ago....
...my house was more organized
...my life was less messy
...my hands were manicured and my feet were pedicured
...I slept through the night
...I spent money on my own wardrobe more often than once every couple of years
...I mostly did whatever I pleased

6 years ago...
...I was waiting for our first baby to arrive and I didn't realize how incomplete life was
...I thought to myself, "I'm so glad it's a fall baby so I have a full six years home with him."

Now...
...I realize how short of a time span 6 years is
...my baby is headed off to kindergarten and I can't help the tears that pool in my eyes
...my house is never clean, my nails are never done and I'm hardly organized at all
...through my tears I know I wouldn't trade a minute of it and if I could make 6 years last longer, I would do it in a second.

Photo

2011-08-12T21:42:00.000-05:00

No shirt, no shoes, no service

2011-08-02T22:10:00.001-05:00

So today we went to the library. This is a big deal. Actually I have been completely putting it off since before Michael's arrival. It's not that I have a personal beef with the library. It's a good place. You (or I) could probably learn a lot there. It's just this little thing called "due date". You know what I mean...that little date they stamp in the front cover telling you when you have to take your item back? We always seem to get some things that are due in a month, some that are due in 10 days, some that are due in a week and some that are due in 3 days. And I can guarantee that because of that, we ALWAYS have at least one late fee every time we go to the library. I use rotating library cards just for that reason. I have three of them, and I figure at least one of them is free of late fees at any given time.

But I digress. My story really was headed elsewhere. I got three boys out of the van, stroller loaded, diaper bag slung on my back, books ready to go and headed into the library. We navigated our huge load all the way to the far side of the library to the children's section. That alone was an accomplishment. I see the librarians at the children's desk give us a funny look and begin to confer with each other. I shrugged it off, thinking that they were looking at us and thinking that it would be a rowdy bunch. Then I saw one lady give Max in particular a really funny look and head over toward us with her mouth set in a grim line. And an expression aimed at me that said, "Lady, you've got that crazy look in your eye, your curls are sticking all over the place and I really don't want to confront you, but it looks like I will have to." It was at that moment that I looked at Max...and really SAW him. He was dressed in cowboy boots (that are about 3 sizes too big) and Thomas swimming trunks. And NOTHING else. He was 100% bare-chested. And I think he had some ketchup on his face from lunch.

I quickly turned tail and ran...but not very fast, if you recall the size of my load. More like, I shuffled as quickly as possible with Mikey crying and the boys wondering why in the world I was making them leave the library when they hadn't picked out their books yet. I went to the doors and left ALL three boys standing there, yelling out instructions for them to wait right there while I bolted to the van. Sure enough, there was Maxwell's shirt next to his carseat. I grabbed it and ran back to the library, taking time to notice this time the sign on the door that said, 'Shirt and shoes required' (however, this leads me to ponder whether or not one actually has to wear pants in the library?). Oh, and did I mention that I was in such a rush to get the shirt that I tried to open the van door before it was unlocked and set off the alarm? And the pictures are worn off the buttons and the batteries are mostly dead on our key FOB so I really had no idea how to make it shut off. I just kept pushing buttons until it finally quit.

I'm not going to lie, I think the librarians were only marginally relieved that we had returned with Max's shirt on. It's possible that they were wishing for us to go to a different library, but all in all the rest of the trip was rather uneventful. Later, when I asked Max why he took off his shirt, he said, "well mom, I was hot." I learned that it's very important to look my children over from head to toe before I enter any place of business.

Obviously, Denae. Obviously.

13 minutes

2011-07-27T16:26:00.000-05:00

A lot can happen in 13 minutes. A baby can take a first breath, a person can take a last breath, a kitchen can go from spotless to tornado-like destruction, a person can shower, shave and brush their teeth, or have half of a work out. It's not really a long period of time, but it's enough time to drift into that period of utter comfort right between wakefulness and sleeping. That place where you are sure you can't move because you are so comfortable and a floating sensation takes over your body.

OR...13 minutes can be the amount of time it takes for clogged gutters to overflow causing a small lake to form in the bedroom of two heavily sleeping boys. And two of those things happened last night. It was a rough night and I couldn't sleep. I had a massive headache and watched the clock tick away. Midnight came and went. As did 1, 2, and 3 o'clock. Finally I looked at the clock at 3:48 and started to feel myself drift to that place of bliss between wakefulness and sleeping. That happened right after it started raining and Brian woke up to check the gutters. At exactly 4:01 (13 glorious minutes of almost-sleep later) Brian came bursting into the bedroom telling me that the gutters were plugged and that there was water literally rushing in through the window in the boys' room. I hauled my over-exhausted body out of bed and we threw on the nearest clothes. The next 2 hours passed in a blur of moving boys, sucking up water, ripping carpet out and moving totes full of stuff. Brian had a couple of trips to the roof and I had to deal with a plugged drain that caused our laundry room to overflow even more (it also had a small lake in it before that).

At 6:05 a.m., I crawled my weary bones back into bed and Brian went to Walmart to get a new fuse for our dehumidifier that suddenly stopped working. At 6:18 (13 minutes later...notice a pattern here?) Michael woke up needing to be changed and fed. I finally drifted off to sleep around 6:45 after checking that Brian was back and had things working downstairs. I was able to sleep until 8:00 when the boys woke me up for the day. 1 hour and 15 minutes of sleep, and two, 13-minute periods of almost sleep is not quite enough. No indeed. In fact, right now in the 13-minutes it took me to type this blog, I should have curled up somewhere for another blissful period of almost sleep. This too, shall pass.

Michael-3 months

2011-07-26T08:15:00.000-05:00

It's okay

2011-07-25T23:44:00.000-05:00

The other day a lady asked me how Michael was sleeping at night. I will admit that for a moment I wanted to lie and tell her that he has been sleeping through the night since he was 2 weeks old! Not because he has, but because I wanted to be that "good" mom with the "good" baby. Somehow it seems like people label us "good" or "bad" based on things we can't always change.

When people used to ask me if Mitchell and Max were good sleepers (it really seems to be the first question I always hear) I automatically assumed I was doing something wrong because they were not sleeping through the night. I thought that if I tried Babywise they would sleep through the night. I thought I MUST be swaddling them wrong if they are waking up. I was SURE I probably didn't produce enough milk because if they are waking up hungry, then surely there is something wrong with me. I was POSITIVE that I probably ruined my kids because I got an epidural when I gave birth and that they would never sleep through the night. The other day I actually came across a tidbit some people consider sleeping through the night to be from 12-5:00 a.m. Well, I can assure you that my version of sleeping through the night consists of 10-12 hours without waking up! Semantics can really mess with a girl's head!

And then I woke up one day and realized that it is what it is. My kids don't sleep through the night until they are at least 8 months of age. They are healthy, happy and growing, so their milk is fine. I swaddle them to within an inch of their lives (just kidding!) and sometimes I don't. Some babies sleep through the night not being swaddled at all...some babies don't. Some kids sleep through the night when they are 2 weeks old. Some babies don't. Just like some adults do ALL different kinds of things from each other because we are all created differently. And beautifully!

...so I looked the lady in the eye and said, "No, he generally wakes up a few times during the night, but we're making it." She said, "You know, I look back and realize how fast our babies grow up and it makes those times in the middle of the night seem precious and almost sacred to me. The house is dark and quiet and it's just you and the baby." I think I breathed an audible sigh of relief. This stranger did not automatically assume I was doing something wrong because my baby doesn't sleep all night long.

I have felt the same way on occasion. Not that I mind a full night's sleep, but I have Mikey all to myself at 3:00 a.m. I just sit there in the quiet and look at his peaceful innocent face and I wonder and pray about what his life holds. There is something in that moment that I absolutely cannot explain, but I don't wish it away, either.

It is what it is. Life is what it is. Our households all operate differently. Our kids are different. We are different. Sometimes I find so much reassurance in that. Change what you can change, let the rest go!

Riding on Doors

2011-07-19T14:16:00.002-05:00

This is one of those things I write because I think it's funny. But I don't want my kids to know I think it's funny until about 20 years down the road.

Our kids are good kids. Generally. They really are. They are obedient. They are thoughtful. They take care of each other. They pick up their messes. They do what I tell them. Most of the time. But SOMETIMES, when all is quiet (too quiet) in the house and the hairs on the back of my neck stand up just a little bit, alerting me to trouble, I KNOW that when I walk into another room, the outcome will not be good.

The other day I was feeding Michael in the family room. I generally can't hear the garage door from the family room, but now I wish I could. The boys had been playing quietly outside for about 1/2 an hour (and I was SO impressed that they were playing nicely outside and that no one was running in to tattle or need a band-aid) when all of a sudden, it got a little TOO quiet. Next thing I know, Mitchell is standing next to me. "Mom, I'm afraid we burned out the garage door motor," he said. I'm sure I had the dumbest look on my face as I said, "What do you mean?" I did not believe it could be so, but then, I've underestimated these busy little boys before.

He took me by the hand to show me exactly what was going on when the garage door stopped working. I had parked the van backwards in the garage because I was unloading groceries. The boys discovered that they could climb on top of the van and reach the top of the garage door if it was open. One of them would stand on the van and hold onto the door, and the other would be on the floor and push the main garage door button at a pre-determined signal. The boy on top of the van would then "ride" the garage door down as far as they could before jumping/falling to the ground. Then they switched places and did it again...and again...and again, until the garage door stopped working.

Now, all discipline (and yes, there was appropriate discipline) and fear of injury aside, I have to give those boys kudos for creativity and teamwork. I will admit that there was a big part of me that was relieved that they didn't get hurt and a little part (okay, maybe a big part) of me that applauds their imagination and the 30 minutes of peace and quiet it afforded me one very hot afternoon. Who ever said summer was boring did NOT live at our house.

bummer

2011-07-01T14:00:00.001-05:00

What is a bummer, though, is when said coffee (see previous 2 posts) after being warmed for about the 3rd time is spilled by a very zealous 4-year old. Almost an entire mug of coffee got spilled into the bin with ALL of the coloring books and crayons. And oddly enough, there was a sizeable amount left for the chairs and floor. Today was clearly NOT meant for coffee.

Trying Again

2011-07-01T11:39:00.004-05:00

About a year ago, I started a cranky journal. I think it's time I do it again. I just feel absolutely at the limit today. A cranky journal is a list of things that make me mad/upset/stressed and something positive about each of them.

1. Our house is always in a constant state of disarray.
( I am thankful that we have a house. I am thankful that my boys are active and creative. The fingerprints on the windows are reminders of their little hands. I HAVE to be less neat than I used to be because it's not physically possible for me to keep up with it).

2. Mitchell is always destroying stuff, taking stuff apart, scattering things all over
(I am glad that his mind is always developing. I can see engineering tendencies in him when he has to know how EVERYTHING works. I am glad to be where I am so that I can teach him to pick up after himself, even if it is one of the hardest things to teach him.)

3. Mitchell is pushing every single boundary right now and I find myself yelling a lot
(I am forced to think of new and creative ways to discipline. I am forced to pray more often than I would because most days I really just don't know what to do as I have tried everything. I often have to seek God for wisdom and it gives me comfort to know that he will give me what I ask for. We have to constantly come up with constructive things for him to do otherwise he is destructive. As a result, he is learning to be helpful and has more chores around the house than most 10-year olds and he prefers it that way. And he is learning responsibility.)

That's all for now. Time for some pre-school worksheets. Pray for us! :)

*By the way...coffee warmed up in the microwave isn't the worst thing in the world. (See previous post!)

The life of little boys

2011-07-01T10:29:00.002-05:00

I was reading some posts from last summer when I realized how good it is for me to write stuff out. I usually use the excuse that I don't have time, but really, the time I spend doing this will probably make me a better mom in the end.

I have been praying for patience lately. These boys sure know how to push it. I have to daily remember to be thankful because I know that if it got taken away from me, I would be miserable! But day to day, I sometimes think there is nothing I can do to keep sanity. Granted, I suppose a lot of this stems from having a new baby in the house, but there is only so much one mom can take.

I put stuff away, they take it out. I sweep, they put crumbs on the floor. I organize, they un-organize. I put Mikey to sleep, they wake him up. I clean the bathroom, they put toothpaste all over everything. I sit down to feed Michael, and suddenly it's like a tornado hits our house. There is NOTHING I can do that lets us move forward without stepping back about 80 steps at the same time. I swear, I go to bed at night with a clean kitchen, and by the time I wake up in the morning, it's a crazy mess. Is there dirty dish fairies waiting in the cabinets just to make their move and come out and mess things up?

Right now in fact, is a perfect example of my insanity. I sent the boys outside to ride bikes. Lately, all they've wanted to do is cling to me and I am pretty much being "touched" in some form or another for about 23.5 hours a day. I got Michael to sleep, and Mitchell come charging in his room, yelling about something and woke him up. Then he (Mitchell) started crying. Michael is yelping because he is now awake. Max is yelling from the door that he can't get his sandals on or his helmet off or something. So I tell Mitchell to go back outside, at which he proceeds to have a tantrum (yes, he's 5) creating further chaos in this house. There are couch cushions off of every couch in the house, dishes all over the counter, water and soap all over the bathroom, unmade beds and 2 out of three kids crying (yes, the two big ones...the baby hardly ever cries. I think he knows that there is enough other stuff going on). And yet I sit here and type.

Why, you may ask? Because somedays, it's all I've got. It's a small escape where I pretend the chaos is calming ocean waves, and that those kids that are crying are coming from a tv somewhere and my kids are all happily adjusted to having a new person in the house and are outside creating their own fun. I also pretend that this cold coffee I didn't get a chance to drink is supposed to be cold on purpose. Kind of like a iced latte or something.

Well, Mikey is hungry. So off I go to the never ending baby-buffet that used to be my body. All in all, it's just another day in paradise. (one I wouldn't trade for the world!)

2 months

2011-06-30T22:52:00.003-05:00

7 weeks old!

Here are Michael's 2 month status updates:

Height 26" (yep, he grew 6 inches in 2 months!). His height is off of the curve because he's so tall.
Weight: 15 lbs. 4 oz. (97th percentile).
Head: I don't remember. But I'm sure it's big, too.

He a big boy, that's for sure. I have nick-named him "Turbo"...short for "Turbo-eater."

Distraction

2011-05-28T11:01:00.004-05:00

Mikey came 10 days late...it was a long 10 days! My good friend, Breahanna Cleland came over and took some "belly" photos for a distraction. It's not usually my style, BUT it was fun, distracting, and I really liked how some of them turned out.

All Smiles

2011-05-19T22:42:00.000-05:00

Michael Brian
One Month Old

Mitchell-5 1/2, Maxwell-4, Michael-5 days

2011-05-04T22:18:00.007-05:00

Michael Brian

2011-04-27T07:31:00.002-05:00

Michael Brian
born: April 20, 2011 at 3:33 p.m.
weight: 7 lbs. 14 oz.
height: 20 1/2 inches
head circumference: 13 1/2 inches

More quotes

2011-04-01T21:59:00.002-05:00

Where, oh where does the time go? I can't believe it's April and almost time to welcome the newest addition to the family. I was going to keep up on blogging, and here it is, 2 months later and I haven't posted. So here are a couple of "kid-isms" from the past few months.

"I'm pretty sure I was BORN to eat sugar." -Mitchell

One day while waiting for the pizza delivery man, Max finally spotted him and ran to the door and yelled out, "HEY PIZZA GUY!" It was a college kid and he had barely opened the door to his car when Max bellowed. He turned pretty red.

Instead of 7-up, the boys refer to that type of soda as 7-8.

One night at the dinner table, Mitchell looks over at me and just bursts out, "I LOVE YOU! I just couldn't hold it in anymore....kind of like poopy." (I wasn't sure if I should take that as a compliment or what, but it was pretty hilarious.)

"We have to do the government's choice- and I'M the government." -Mitchell (when trying to get Max to do something he wants him to do.

"It's time to play MONSTER-JAM!" -Maxwell (as he dumped out an entire drawer full of Hotwheels Monster Trucks on top of me in bed at 6:30 a.m.

One Sunday we were visiting my parents' church and they were celebrating communion. Max wanted to participate, so I leaned over and whispered to him that people start taking communion after they tell the whole church that they love Jesus. He looked at me with innocent eyes and a tear in his voice and said (LOUDLY) "But Mom, I already DO love Jesus." It was a sweet and precious moment, and I'll admit that I let him have the communion bread. I have never met a more pure heart than his was on that day.

"Let's get this party started!" -The boys while running into our room one morning after a particularly restful night's sleep.

-"Thanks, boys, for obeying with a cheerful heart!" -Mommy (after they displayed some rather non-cheerful attitudes while obeying. "Mom, I'll obey but I DO NOT have a cheerful heart right now." -Maxwell (hey, he was being blatantly honest!)

A couple of nights ago, we took the boys to an arena football game. We were waiting for it it start and a group of boys came on the field to sing the National Anthem. Max leaned over and said, (in a very disappointed voice) "I thought we were here for FOOTBALL, not SINGING time." I guess my next lesson will be respect for the national anthem.

Quotes

2011-01-24T08:59:00.003-06:00

While watching something about mushrooms, the narrarator said that mushrooms are sometimes called fungi: Max said, "HEY! I'm a fun guy, too!!"

Mitchell: "Max forgot to flush the toilet. That's NOT very Christian."

Mitchell: "Mom, I put a surprise in your breakfast." (I was a little leery of eating it, but I found out later that he meant love! :)

Max to Brian (while he was eating his dinner late one night while sitting in the recliner): "DADDY! STOP! You are breaking the law. We can only eat dinner at the table!"

Mitchell: "Max, how did you sleep?"
Max: "TERRIFIC!"

Mitchell: "Mom, I can understand how I'm a part of you since I was in your tummy and everything, but what I DON'T get is how I could be a part of Daddy, too. How does that work?"
(I decided to tell him that God made Mommies and Daddies in a special way, so they could both be part of a baby. It worked for the time being, but I'm just buying time. I totally know that!)

Christmas Cards

2011-01-02T23:31:00.002-06:00

My "goal" for the new year is to AT LEAST post some pictures. This is our Christmas card for the year. We didn't order enough (sorry if you didn't get one!) but our list for next year should be better.

I hope you all had a MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Big News

2010-10-17T20:20:00.002-05:00

Pictures of the Boys

2010-10-16T21:36:00.003-05:00

I took some pictures of the boys today. I'll post some more later, but here are a couple.

Mitchell's First Lost Tooth

2010-09-26T22:22:00.005-05:00

As told by Brian:

Thursday we went for a walk around the block. Max rode his Big Wheel and Mitchell rode his scooter (his bike had been taken away, but that's another story). Max was out ahead of all of us with Mitchell following ahead of Denae and I.

As we walked, we watched Mitchell wipe out and flip over the handle bars of his scooter. He landed flat on his face. I ran up and picked him up. I immediately saw blood on his face and I saw that one of his front teeth had been knocked loose because it was sticking down from the others and into his mouth. I held him up for Denae to see and said "He's Messed up". Mitchell was screaming, so I threw him over my shoulder and ran for the house. Denae caught up to Max and followed after.

When I got Mitchell to the kitchen table, I started to clean the blood of his face. Most of the blood was from his upper lip (which was quite swollen by now) and his dislodged tooth. He calmed down fairly quickly considering the circumstances. By the time Denae arrived, Mitchell had calmed down and most of the blood was out of the way. So we turned our attention to the dislocated tooth.

I tried to put the tooth back into place. But it wouldn't go back in easily because the gums were swollen and it caused Mitchell a lot of discomfort when I touched it. Denae called the dentist emergency phone number. While she did, I chatted with Mitchell about how kids lose their baby teeth and new "adult" teeth grow in their place. I also mentioned the benefits of the "tooth fairy". I figured I might as well prepare him in the case the tooth came out. There was no answer on the dentist phone. So we decided to put Mitchell to bed without brushing and worry about it in the morning.

Mitchell spent the day Friday trying to avoid the tooth. He didn't eat a whole lot, even though it didn't seem to hurt him as much. By Friday night, I convinced him to let me try to pull it out. I gave it a couple of tries, but he wouldn't let me get a good grip on it. So we brushed around the tooth and put him to bed.

Saturday morning he got up as normal and watched some cartoons. One of the cartoons was about a boy who didn't want the tooth fairy to take his tooth, so he wrote a note to the tooth fairy to "please leave his tooth behind". Mitchell was absolutely fascinated by this particular episode.

By Saturday night, Mitchell was quite interested in getting the tooth out. He tried to pull on it a couple of times, but couldn't get it out. Finally he asked me if I would try. I got a good grip and pulled it right out. Mitchell was very excited, but he was concerned that the tooth fairy would deprive him of his new treasure. So we wrote a note to the tooth fairy just as he had seen in the cartoon.

This morning, he woke up with a crisp dollar bill and his tooth intact. It also happens to be his birthday.

This picture shows his new toothless grin. It makes him look so old. Yes, that is Max doing a cartwheel in the background.

ROOOOAAAAARRRR!

2010-09-14T12:07:00.002-05:00

That is what I feel like doing today. I am just crabby. I want to go home. No-I have not been faithful at blogging yet again. But you know what? In the end it really doesn't matter if I kept a daily blog or not. I used to feel guilty for not doing it. But if the last nine weeks has taught me nothing else, it has taught me to just do the best I can on a daily basis. I will not make everyone happy. I cannot make everyone happy...or even less mad. And it's basically me that has set such high standards for myself. So only I can change that. But today, I'm in no mood for change.

Maxwell has been up since 5:30 a.m. Mitchell has been up since 6:30 a.m. And guess what? They are both very CRABBY. Mitchell won't take a bath because the temperature is not cold enough. Max wouldn't get in because it wasn't hot enough. So far they have pulled hair, hit and taken each other's toys away. So do you know what I started doing? Packing. Yep, I just can't be here anymore. I miss our big South facing windows. I miss our yard and our home. I miss our friends and family.

-as a side note, I finally just got Mitchell in the tub and it was TOO cold. I had all I could do to speak calmly to him and to not lose my temper.-

So here are some stats for our family since April of this year...

-we have traveled over 200 hours in the van
-we have packed and unpacked out suitcases over 31 times
-we have stayed in 17 different hotels
-we have lived in 2 separate apartments
-we have visited more than 23 tourist attractions
-we participated in a Tulip Festival including setting a world record for wooden shoe dancing
-we celebrated the 4th of July in Pella and the very next weekend went to the All-School Reunion in Pollock, and left four days later for Denver
-we babysat our niece for 1 week, the same week we had a garage sale and I am now convinced that it was the only week all summer that we were actually home
-we have been away from our beds for 9 weeks
-we have taken 4 airplane rides
-we made it to Canada
-we spent and extra night in Minot, ND after missing the last flight out of town and getting one of the last available hotel rooms
-I have photographed 4 weddings
-we have cooked 9 weeks worth of meals using two kettles, a spatula, a slotted spoon and a really bad knife
-We have had numerous house-guests, on pretty much every weekend that we weren't traveling. I think I have washed guest sheets over 20 times this summer.

And we are tired. We are all tired. We learned that we cannot go running every time someone wants us at an event. We learned that sometimes we have to say no when people want to stay over at our house. We learned that sometimes even ministry or Bible Study are things that need to be given up. We learned that we don't have to have a seven-course meal every night to get full and to enjoy our time together. We learned that we LOVE our home and we feel blessed to have it. We learned that we control how most of our time is spent, not other people. We have learned that sometimes hanging onto an activity just because it's what we've always done is not the right reason to be involved in something. And we learned that we don't want to be guilted into doing things just because someone else asked us to.

The boys are bathing (in separate tubs) and so far it's quiet and calm in here. I have 2 1/2 suitcases packed. We have 3 days, 1 hotel stay and 12 hours in the car before we get home. And then, we are going to rest. And I CAN'T wait.

There is no reason for over-achievement

2010-08-31T17:28:00.002-05:00

This trip is teaching me to LAYOFF. I have barely cooked since we got here. Usually I would be horrified to admit such a thing, but let's face it. In a kitchen with 2 pots and 4 utensils, cooking isn't really all it's cracked up to be. We have breakfast provided and a snack bar in the evening. So I have fed the boys food from the snack bar (sometimes chips and salsa, other times gluey pasta) for their supper. If they are hungry at night, I will fry them an egg or make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. For lunch, we might go out, or have sandwiches or "gasp" macaroni and cheese from a box. And guess what? The boys are growing. The boys are thriving and I haven't noticed a decline in their intelligence either. No one ever said kids have to have waffles with fresh fruit for breakfast, or that I have to make a huge meal at night every night. Sometimes if I feel they have had a really un-balanced day here, I'll feed them pizza (covers all the food groups...LOL) or V-8 Fusion (fruit and vegetable juice). Okay, there is something to be said about being healthy, but there's also something to be said for not letting the labels on the backs of the food dictate your life.

I met a friend here who has not let her 4-year old try pop (soda, Coke or whatever else you choose to call it). I had a moment of guilt. My boys know and LOVE pop. It's their Friday treat. (I think everyone should have a Friday Treat, by the way). But then I got over it. Am I really doing my kids harm by letting them have pop? Moreover, is she doing her kid any GOOD by NOT letting her have pop? Or, is it the same as almost everything else...do what you think is best, and practice moderation. I'm not ruining my kids and she's probably not ruining hers.

And I must be growing. Because I just freely admitted that I have been feeding my kids junk for a month and a half, AND that they drink pop on a regular basis. No, of course I don't mean they sit down and drink a 2-liter of Coke, but you get the drift. Sometimes I get so worn-out trying to keep up with all of the "healthy" people. Don't feed your kids sugar (yeah-I think I'll just sit them down with, um...um...let's see, what doesn't have some form of sugar in it??). Don't let them drink pop or eat candy. Don't let them out of your sight. Ever. Period. Even when you have to use the restroom. Make sure they always get 3 square meals a day, including fresh fruits and vegetables (at least 27 servings). Don't feed them margarine (a.k.a. Plastic). Try a healthy granola and rice-cake covered in raisins for an afternoon snack alternative. And the list goes on. It makes my head hurt.

How about this set of abbreviated (and changeable) rules? Enjoy your kids. Spend time with them where you are not trying to force broccoli, bananas or other fruits and vegetables down their throats. Sometimes in the store when they ask for white bread, go ahead and BUY it. And then EAT it. Sit down for dinner together, but don't make it a battle. If they don't want to eat, then don't make them eat (but then they don't eat until breakfast or the next meal or whatever your house rule is). Eat outside sometimes, or use paper plates. Less clean-up equals less stress. If your kid enjoys an occasional pop or kool-aid, let them enjoy it. Maybe have one yourself.

I am not promoting living on junk food. But for the sake of your family, really think twice about the idea of eating all organic, no sugar, nothing refined ALL of the time. But then again, if that is what you choose and that is what gives your family peace, GO FOR IT! Who am I to judge? I'm just a mom looking for balance in a topsy-turvy world. I better go find my kids...it's time for a kool-aid break (probably containing red#5...or is it yellow #40? I can never remember which one to avoid). :)

A generous heart (and other things)

2010-08-27T10:15:00.002-05:00

A couple of weeks ago, I celebrated my 30th birthday. It wasn't emotionally traumatic or anything, but it's weird to be at an age that used to seem "old" to me. We had a quiet celebration here in Denver, but it was a day that will stick out in my memory for a while.

I took the boys to an art center that day. A place where they could pick out any "craft" from the selection and then paint it, decorate it and glue it. It took a little motivation for me to get them there as most of you that know me know that "crafts" are not my strong suit. Okay, that's a lie. I REALLY hate sitting down to do crafts. Since it was my birthday, I decided that going to a craft place would be fun for the boys and I wouldn't have to do the set-up, or the clean-up, or anything else other than help them paint and glue, so it would be fun for me, too.

Mitchell looked over all of the various ceramics, sand art, painting etc. that they had to offer and came over to me and asked, "Mommy, may I get this (wooden jewelry box) or is it too much money?" I told him it would be fine for him to get that. He responded with, "Thanks, Mommy, but will you try really hard not to look at it?" Of course, I had to help him with a few things, but he immediately set to work decorating this box. Every time he asked for help he would say, "Mommy, will you help me glue this? But close your eyes while you do?" I was as discreet as possible and helped him to "hide" it from me as much as possible.

When we got home, he immediately found a place to hide his treasure (because we always make a big deal out of hiding birthday presents at our house). As soon as Brian came home, Mitchell took him to the back bedroom where they must have had a little conference. They came out with two wrapped gifts. I opened the gift from Brian and the boys first and it was JEWELRY! I almost started crying because I realized that Mitchell made me the jewelry box on purpose. So next I opened his gift, and he said, "Mommy-I made this for you so we could put your new jewelry in it." He remembered shopping with Brian for jewelry for me and then instead of choosing a craft for himself at the art center, he chose something for ME, and he did it with intent. It still makes me a little teary. What a sweet, precious and generous heart. I will have that little painted jewelry box on my dresser for a very long time, I am sure. I get it now...why parents save their kids art projects for years and years.

We finished off the day by enjoying a delicious meal at the Melting Pot, a fondue restaurant here in town. It was a delightful 4-course meal, with each course being something we could fondue right at the table.

Somehow turning 30 made me feel reflective. I always said without a doubt that I would be done having kids by the time I turned 30. Now I'm not so sure. I always thought it would be horrible to be in the generation that is not current with every technological trend. But it's not so bad. I always thought I would never get to the age where I looked at teenagers and wondered what on earth they were thinking when they (put that outfit on, got something random pierced, or did their hair that way) and now I find myself wondering that sometimes. I realize that I am quite happy to be done with that phase of my life. I am happy to realize a little bit more about myself and the world every year. I am happy to have attended my high-school reunion and to FINALLY realize that what they think really doesn't matter. Maybe I'm growing up after all.

A day at the beach

2010-08-16T15:51:00.003-05:00

This post is pretty much self-explanatory. It was a wonderful day...staring at the mountains, sun on our backs and sand all around.

Denver Children's Museum

2010-08-16T15:43:00.005-05:00

"Mom, I'm a super-hero."

Train conductor

Mitchell was dressing as a prince

Max decided to be a turtle

Fireman Mitchell

Little Scientists in their lab coats

Pikes Peak

2010-08-15T16:26:00.004-05:00

One of the rare family photos we have (it will probably be our Christmas card)

If this pictures looks familiar...I seem to bring fog and cloud with me whenever I go see a national wonder. Pikes peak looked about the same to me as the Grand Canyon.

The view on the way down was quite stunning, though.

Snow in July

Getting ready to throw snowballs at the innocent camera-woman

The view as we started driving out of the clouds

Various Pictures

2010-08-12T21:50:00.004-05:00

Playing in a tree house at a local park

Nothing like sand...

...and fountains to wash the sand off

Rolling down a grassy hill (the parks in Denver are really quite great)

"Hey Mom, we can do push-ups."

Posing with a moose at a local mall

Mitchell decided to do his own version of face painting on Max

It turned out fairly well...and what surprises me the most is that Max just LET him do it

Friday night at the downtown aquarium

Check out the size of that fish behind the boys. The aquarium has been on of their favorite places so far.

Speaking of neurosis

2010-08-04T21:56:00.003-05:00

...did you know that all of the towels don't have to be folded the exact same way when they are stacked in the linen closet? They still dry exactly the same when you use them. This handy little release of neurosis comes from Brian.

Who would have thought?? All those years of trying to get my towels all folded the same way, and then organized by shade. No wonder I was constantly stressed!

Simplify, simplify, simplify

2010-08-04T18:09:00.003-05:00

There is a lot on my mind and I have been thinking that I really should post. This is for the 3 of you that read my blog. :) I don't know how to get it all into words, but I guess I'll call on my journalism background for that.

Life has slowed down considerably. Not to the point where I'm not busy, because raising kids is always busy, but now I'm living first and "doing" second. I have had some time for reflection (mostly because I'm not trying to do 5 MILLION things at once) and I think I like it this way. I wonder how I am going to keep the simplified life once we get home. I have a few ideas...

1. Throw away all toys that take batteries and make noise on their own. It has been truly refreshing to see my boys' imaginations come ALIVE. Today Max got hurt and I went to get a band-aid. Mitchell made sure Max was comfortable and then came to me and said, "Doctor Matherly, the patient is now ready to see you."

2. Go for a walk every single day, even if it's cold outside. It seems so simple, and I even had doctor's orders to do this (so I didn't dig an early grave for myself) but I just couldn't find the time. And I didn't know how to get out of the rut of my life going 100 mph at all times. This morning the boys and I went for a walk and played follow the leader. I was skipping and jumping on benches behind them and I didn't care (not even for a nano-second) what people thought about me. And it was all around our courtyard here. The best part? We were all in our pajamas.

3. Remember that kids are created to gain independence. I have been just letting the kids out from under my 24 hour surveillance and they are blossoming! Just because I have kids (who I love and adore) doesn't mean I have to have them within arms distance 24 hours a day. Having them under my wing 24 hours a day is not healthy and it teaches them NO independence. 24 year olds in the world who are still dependent on their parents (Just think, 2 generations ago people were married and raising families by the time they were 18!) is not how I want my boys to be. They will grow up being responsible members of society who know how to pull their own weight. Being a helicopter mom creates whiners and kids who are incapable of functioning on their own. I think in the last year I was starting to lean that way. NO MORE HELICOPTER mommy for this lady. 3 and 4 year old boys can dress themselves down to their shoes. They are capable of clearing the table, making their beds and putting their shoes and clothes away. They are capable of loading the washer and moving clothes from the washer to the dryer. Kids should be kids, but there is NO reason for me to cater to their every wish.

4. Trust my instincts. If I wanted to find research to support any whim I'm having, I could. The internet is full of all kinds of junk and there are enough people in the world to support every opinion I might come up with. For crying out loud, every single product I use COULD cause cancer. Every food I eat could cause tons of other horrific diseases. My kids growth could be stunted if I don't do enough educational things with them. Phooey on it all. Moms were made with instincts. I refuse to believe for a moment longer that everything in my whole entire world (including this keyboard which thousands of germs are clinging to) is toxic. I will not fall prey to it anymore. I will trust that the FDA knows what they are talking about. I am going to live my life and not hide in a closet due to risks of whatever god-forsaken disease, kidnapper, or choking hazard (1 in 3,000,000 chance-pretty slim if you ask me) is lurking behind the proverbial corner.

5. The world keeps spinning even when I'm standing still. Everything in Sioux Falls is running just fine, even without me there to do whatever it is that I was so constantly busy with. My photography clients have found other photographers or they are waiting for me. The ministry I'm involved in is running smoothly, our house has not fallen apart, girls nights continue to happen and wandering neighbors are still being taken care of. The point? The world is not dependent on my "expert" skills in order for God's cosmic plan to still happen. Clearly I am not the center of the universe and yet, I was so sure that everything would fall apart without me. What a humbling thought to realize that I am a spec of dust, and yet the God of the universe still sees it in his great mercy to love me (and all you other specs of dust) so infinitely that he covers my every transgression with pure grace. Astounding!

6. Remember that kids are resilient. I am not perfect, nor will I ever be. I am not raising perfect children and the entire worth of my existence is not based on how well my kids behave in stores or around other people. My kids will not automatically turn into hermits with crushed spirits if I speak harshly to them (especially if I realize my error and apologize and admit that I am human after all. Lord knows it's hard to blow the super-mom cover). My kids will not necessarily need therapy because I am doing everything wrong. For heaven's sake, we could ALL use a little therapy. And if they need to have therapy to help them grow throughout their life, then so be it. We are creatures that are intended to grow and develop all of our earthly lives. If that weren't the case, there would be no aging process. So you probably guessed it, I refuse to buy into the current mumbo-jumbo about how kids are shaped almost exclusively by their first three years. I happen to believe that the Creator had something else in mind. My chance to influence my kids is not over when they hit their 4th birthday. It is simply crazy to believe that after the first three years I will spend the next 15-20 years trying to make up for the mistakes I made as a new parent.

In the end, your kid will be who they will be. In the end, if your kid plays hide and seek in the clothes racks at Nordstrom (ah-hem-insert Mitchell and Max here) they are being NORMAL kids. If they run off to the next aisle, they are not going to get abducted in the next instant. If they try on high-heels while you are trying to find a decent pair of shoes, they are not destined to be outcasts. In the end, if I give my kids (gasp) FDA APPROVED sippy cups that have BPA in them (the very material used in the neo-natal intensive care unit to administer medicine) I am not signing them up for a life of cancer. In the end, if I let my four year old ride his bike to the end of the block by himself, I am not calling an accident upon our family.

Don't live in a bubble and forget to actually live while we make rotation after rotation around the sun.

The cranky journal

2010-07-26T11:16:00.002-05:00

The boys and I have come up with a new thing to help us out when we are feeling cranky. They are having a bit of a hard time adjusting to a "new world" as Mitchell calls Denver. Everything is different (even though I brought some of their things from home) and sometimes things feel overwhelming for them (and me, occasionally). Since they are small, they don't always know how to express what they are feeling and it comes out as crankiness and fussiness. So we made a journal where they can tell me what makes them feel cranky and then a small thing we can to do make them feel less cranky.

So this morning, I'm feeling a bit "fussy" myself, so I decided to write out my cranky journal.

I get cranky when...

...the boys disobey me on purpose.
(I can put myself in their shoes and realize that they are in completely different surroundings and most things are not familiar to them. This helps me to treat them differently and find a different way to discipline them without yelling even though that is what I feel like doing.)

...people say, "wow, it must be nice to be on vacation for 2 months"
(I can smile and nod and just play along instead of convincing people that moving a family of four across the country for a couple of months is not actually a picnic. Sometimes I realize that it makes people feel better to think that they have a reason to feel sorry for themselves and it makes me less upset that people think my life is a giant vacation.)

...I look at the floor in this place and see how gross and dirty it is and that I don't have a vacuum to clean it with. I have to depend on spotty maid service with vacuums that might not actually work.
(I can take delight in the freedom that comes from not actually being able to clean. I don't have cleaning cloths, a broom, a vacuum or anything else that I would be obsessing over using at our house. I just have to step back, relax and realize that my kids will not die from living in a place that is not up to my standards of clean. Oddly, I don't go crazy when the boys drop play-doh all over the floor or the dishwasher leaks. It's strangely freeing to live in a less than spotless environment.)

Wow, so it does feel better to write it out. I think I am going to be able to change my attitude now. The boys are playing in the bathroom sink-and I don't even care if they get water all over the place. I talked to the front desk, and we were not supposed to get this room-we were supposed to have a different room that has been remodeled with new beds and furniture, etc. However, they did not have that room available for us, so I am thankful we have a place to sleep. I am thankful that we have two bathrooms. I am thankful that most of the burners on the stove work and that we are close to the clubhouse and the pool. And the three stories of stairs with no elevator is working great for toning my backside. Especially when carrying a 35# kid and groceries. We have a cookie sheet and we can bake cookies, so in the end, what adventure really goes the way we plan? If it did, it surely wouldn't be called an adventure.

Max's 3 year pictures

2010-07-25T22:58:00.003-05:00

I am hoping to get through boatloads of pictures while I am here. I have been terrible at archiving, and I hope to get that resolved. This slower pace of life suits me very well.

Here are a couple of Max's 3 year pictures. I had him dressed all cute and he grabbed that old cowboy hat and wore it all day. I decided it makes him look cute and 3. I was going to do a re-shoot, but I decided I want to remember Max just as he is right now. And these pictures definitely show him as he is.

Playing around at 10,000 ft

2010-07-25T22:41:00.006-05:00

Yesterday we made a trip to Winter Park, CO. The drive up was beautiful. Pictures never do mountains justice, but I posted one anyway. Breathtaking! We reached an altitude of 10,000 ft and spent an entire day playing and enjoying creation. Brian and I both noticed that people in general up there seemed more relaxed and all of the workers were phenomenal with our kids. They were laid back and genuinely helpful. It was a stark contrast to various amusement parks we have visited. We decided that it's hard to be uptight when surrounded by mountains on all sides. It's humbling, and I truly don't understand how someone could see that kind of majesty and doubt the existence of God.

The drive

We took a ride down the Alpine Slide. This was a highlight for us. The slide was the entire length of a mountain and we rode a ski-lift to the top. The boys were speechless!

Max jumping on the bungee trampoline. The harder he jumped, the higher the bungees pulled him up!

Cool dudes waiting in line for the zip line.

Mitchell enjoyed 3 rides on the zip line. He did ask to not go so fast, though. :)

Max zooming down the zip line.

They both showed their brave colors by scaling a pretty high and very steep rock wall. I must admit, Brian and I were both a little surprised by this.

Max, concentrating very hard.

Time for a break with the Coca-cola bear.

On the way home, Mitchell asked, "Mom, did God make mountains just so the clouds would have a place to rest?" I LOVE his mind.

Things to do

2010-07-24T23:22:00.000-05:00

Our apartment here is a bit on the small side...so we have already found some neat things to do "out of the house".

We went on a tour of a candy factory. The boys liked these lollipops that were bigger than their heads.

They are enthralled watching the candy canes being made.

We found a great park that has a petting farm, a train and a creek to play in. The day we were there they also had face-painting.

Spider-man!

My little puppy getting painted. I'm surprised he chose a puppy because most days he asks me to refer to him as "Froggy."

This is what happens when puppy meets rainstorm.

Traveling

2010-07-23T23:17:00.002-05:00

We stopped for the night in North Platte, NE on the way here (Denver). The next morning, we made a little side-trip to the Nations largest train yard. The picture is small, but there were hundreds of train cars that were being coupled to locomotives to be transported. The boys thought it was spectacular!

View from the observation deck

All of my boys in their Hawaiian shirts. They all insist on wearing these anytime we go on any sort of vacation.

Already HE speaks

2010-07-21T10:13:00.002-05:00

"Fully carry out the ministry God has given you."

I would by lying if I said I love change and that all transitions go smoothly. In fact, I grasp the fact that life constantly changes only because I have to. Because I am in the midst of an ever-changing life and there is nothing I can do about it. EXCEPT how I react to it.

This trip to Denver is a change in my plans. I didn't plan on spending half of our summer in Denver. I didn't plan on having to give all of my photography clients to someone else. I certainly didn't plan on living in an apartment smaller than the size of our old house that is equipped with exactly 1 pot, 1 fry pan, a soup ladel, a spoon and a turner. I didn't plan on taking our 3 and 4 year old half-way across the country in a span of two weeks.

But, here we are. And I have been feeling like this is all really a blessing. I have a tendency to throw myself into more and more "stuff" when I start to feel disconnected or unsure. So I take on new clients, I join new ministries, I make more friends, I arrange more outings. And what happens? I get dis-jointed, disconnected from those around me that I love the most, and most importantly disconnected from God. Moving to Denver in the middle of my very busy life, was not in the plan. But it certainly was in God's plan for us.

As I lay in bed this morning, after reading my Bible (which I am embarrassed to admit has fallen by the wayside lately-too busy, you know), I asked God to speak to me. I asked him to show me what he wants from me. And to show me how to discipline the boys without crushing their spirits. I felt a very clear nudging that I need to be there for them. Spend time with them, play with them and not get so wrapped up in the busyness that I have created for myself to run away from my feelings of inadequacy. At that very moment I got a txt with a short message. The message was the verse at the top of this page.

"Work at telling others the Good News, and fully carry out the ministry God has given you." -2nd Timothy 4:5.

That's it! Pow...exactly what I am supposed to be doing. Raising the boys that God has GIVEN me. Not basing my life on photography, or making everyone else happy, or even ministry (although those things all have their places on this planet). I signed up for a daily txt devotional a long time ago, and I end up getting about 1 every 10 days. And it's not consistent. I believe in God's divine timing. I believe that message was intended just for me. I cried. I am supposed to teach my boys about God's love. I am supposed to teach them how to love others and how to share God with others. THEY are my ministry right now. My full focus. I have not been doing that. In fact, I have been so BUSY at times that I end up ignoring my kids. This is NOT what God intended for my life.

I was not supposed to have kids. Humans told me that. God had other plans. It is obvious to me especially that he GAVE me this ministry to fulfill. I was not supposed to be a stay-at-home mom. But God had OTHER plans. I had no choice at the time when Mitchell was born (due to work circumstances-I got fired for being pregnant). So this is my mission. I intend to seek God fully to do my best at the ministry he has given me.

I have prayed in my heart for this to be a time of reflection and truly seeking God. I anxiously await the next message He has for me. I want to encourage you all to set aside some time and really seek the mission God has for your life. His plans are complete and they are plans to prosper you. God is waiting in the wings of all of our lives for us to stop being so busy, and spend some time at His feet. He's there waiting for you.

A break in routine

2010-07-21T10:02:00.003-05:00

I am writing from Denver. Yes, you read right. We have moved here temporarily for Brian's work. He is helping his company start a new branch...so we packed up and moved along for a couple of months. So far, it's already been an adventure.

To start things off, two weeks ago we went to Pella (12 + hours in the car), the next weekend we went to Pollock (12+ hours in the car) and the next Friday we left for Denver (12+ hours in the car). SO...in two weeks, we have been in the car for more than 36 hours. We could all use a break from long road trips! The boys are going to grow up having backsides shaped like a car seat!

Friday night we stopped in North Platte, NE. We almost didn't get a room...that would have been interesting. For those of you who have traveled on this road, there is NOTHING between here and there, so you gotta stop when you can. I'm not sure what we would have done if there wouldn't have been a room available. After packing and trying to finish everything up last week, I was past the point of tears and probably would have just had a fit of hysteria. Brian would have had to get me committed somewhere. And it was hard for him to understand because he said to me, "well, all you have to do is throw a few clothes in some suitcases." Heavenly days! 2 months of being in a strange city (and NOT on an unlimited budget, either) means a lot more than a few clothes in some suitcases.

Ah well, we made it here on Saturday, only to find that our apartment was not supposed to be ready until Monday. So we made a little foray to a Hyatt down the street. Now THAT was a nice break! Monday at 5 we got the keys to our apartment. It's nothing fancy...in fact, the fancy lobby is a bit of a betrayal. We broke a glass the first night and had nothing to clean it up with, so I had to go down three flights of stairs and drive to the office to get a vacuum, and then bring it back. Cleanliness is a little on the lax side, BUT I have stayed in MUCH worse places than this. Back in the summer of 2000 when I went to Amsterdam....oh, but that's a much different story for a much different time.

All in all, I think we'll make it here just fine. They do have a hot breakfast every morning, and maid service once a week. There is a pool right here that we have made daily use out of so far.

I did promise the boys I would look for a park around here...so I best get crackin'!

On the Campaign Trail

2010-06-21T22:56:00.005-05:00

For some reason, our children have taken a liking to Dennis Daugaard. Whenever they see a sign with his name, they yell out "There's Dennis Daugaard!". Since his daughter is an acquaintance of mine, she gave the boys some shirts. They are very proud to wear their Dennis Daugaard shirts.

Labor Day

2010-05-10T09:41:00.006-05:00

I'm still working on the catching up thing. Here are some pictures from Labor Day in 2009. What? I'm only, like, 8 months behind! We had a picnic in the park and had a great time relaxing with family in Pella.

Brian's cousin, Jazz

Sister-in-law, Lexie

Cousin, Olivia

Mitchell trying to see how big of a bubble he could blow.

Lex

Brian's grandpa, Henry

I wonder if he knows there is no bubbles in there...

A little harder, Max!

Brian's aunt Linda

Jazz, Olivia, and Annie

Easter

2010-05-09T21:33:00.002-05:00

This post is a little out of order, but here are the boys all dressed up for Easter.

Tulip Time

2010-05-09T20:27:00.002-05:00

We just got back from a crazy, but fun weekend in Pella. We marched in 3 parades...and wore wooden shoes. Our whole entire extended family (Brian's parents, us, Sarah, Justin and Sophia, Erick and Amy, Annie and Lexie). It was quite a party. Here are just a couple pictures.

Great-Grandparents

2010-03-18T23:50:00.003-05:00

We are so blessed by our family! A couple of weekends ago, we were blessed to have NINE (!) house guests. And (all glory to GOD!) we had room for everyone. Sometimes I take it for granted that I am 29 years old and all four of my grand parents are still living. It's pretty amazing, really. And to top it off, they traveled six hours with my parents to visit us. A couple of the shots below and so dear to my heart. The top one is Grandma doing some mending for me. I just think this picture portrays her. She is always helping people out and has a truly compassionate heart. I knew when I walked upstairs and saw her sitting in the chair working on mending my kids' clothes that I had to take a picture. It is her gift and her way of expressing love.

The second picture was when my boys climbed up on great-grandpa's lap (he's 82!) for an impromptu story-time. He even lifted them up on his lap. My grandpa always took time for us as kids. Some of my best memories are when he would play with us or take Sunday naps with the my cousins and I. When I was really little, we would have Sunday dinner at Grandma's house and all the cousins and aunts and uncles would be there. I'm sure it was a lot of work for the adults, but it was such a party for the kids.

I just found the third picture. It is of Max having another story time with his great-grandpa on my dad's side. This is from this summer. Now I realize that I am only missing my kids with one other great-grandma on my side. I also have a picture somewhere of them with Brian's grandpa. I have not come across that one yet. For some reason these pictures that span the generations bring back memories and make my heart feel tender.

The NEW house

2010-02-19T15:05:00.007-06:00

These are pictures from the listing of our NEW home! Obviously, things are a little different because we have our own furniture (or lack of furniture) in it, but the boys can RUN like crazy and not worry about running into things. Ha ha. I have a few ideas for paint and lighting and such, but for now, everything is in good shape so we're leaving the hammers and paint-brushes lay still for a while. It almost makes me chuckle to type that as I'm sure I'll be swinging a paintbrush before too many more days have passed.

Front of the house. Brian and I promised each other we would NEVER get a corner lot OR a split foyer. Our house is on a corner lot AND is split foyer. LOL

Informal Living room

Formal Living Room with wood-burning fireplace that we LOVE!

Formal Dining Room

Kitchen view (with eat-in area)- from Formal Living Room

Kitchen view- from Informal Living Room

Master Bedroom

Basement Family Room

This room has a second wood-burning fireplace

Work-out room (yeah, right.) It's now my permanent in home studio

Backyard with double decker deck

Enclosed firepit or hot-tub area

Look at that green grass. Ah, will it ever be so again? I sure hope so!

Pictures from the old house

2010-02-19T14:57:00.002-06:00

After the whirlwind of buying this house and selling our old one in three days, things just kept flying. We went right into Thanksgiving, Christmas and Brian's sister's wedding. WHEW! I think we are finally developing a new normal. It's been 3 months already since we moved into this house. It is still quite empty here, but it is HOME and I couldn't ask for more. As long as I get to be here with my family, I could care less if we have furniture or not! I am posting some pictures of the old house before it sold. These are the pictures from the listing. We put it on the market on Friday evening at 6:00 p.m., had 11 showings and accepted an offer on Tuesday morning. There were 2 other couples waiting to buy it, so we felt pretty confident that if the first offer fell through, we would still sell the house fairly quickly. It's a little weird to look at the pictures now. It seems so far away, but yet so familiar!

Front of the house with the new "dill" paint

Dining Room

Kitchen

Living room from front door

Boys' bedroom

Lovely red bathroon

Master Bedroom

Office

Back deck

Back Yard

Homecoming

2010-02-18T22:27:00.002-06:00

We went to our first homecoming celebration for our school this year. Unfortunately, Max was not feeling well and Brian had to work, but Mitchell was still able to participate in some of the events. He got a tattoo (temporary, of course) and a blue mohawk. They also came home with a bag full of candy from the carnival games that they played. Max managed to play a few, too. There was candy at stake, after all.

This last photo is a picture of a play-group we attend on Thursday mornings. The boys have met some new friends (and so have I!).

Apple Orchard

2010-02-18T22:06:00.005-06:00

This fall MItchell's preschool class went to the Apple Orchard for a field trip. And yes, Max pretty much comes along all of the time. Mitchell asks for him to be there, and Max begs to go. They are about as close as brothers can get, so such is how it is. Some people may worry about them growing up to have no identity of their own, but I am not too concerned about that. They are as different as the sun and the moon. I just hope I am able to foster both of their strengths in the ways that they need it! But, God would not have given them to me if He didn't think I could do it.

They had a great time picking apples and running around. I like to look at the pictures because the weather was still nice. It helps me to remember that there will be a time again when there is not snow on the ground!

Max is showing off his pouty face because he wants to be in the "front" car of the train.

Mitchell and his friend, Max Bobo (as my boys call this dear boy for some reason)

Getting ready for the ride on the hay wagon out to pick apples.

I LOVE this picture!

Mitchell's class. All in matching, eye-blinding yellow.

Story time-learning how apples are used.

Mitchell was so excited for his first-ever ride on a school bus. He STILL talks about it!

Photos

2010-02-18T20:02:00.007-06:00

Yes, I'm so far behind. But I'll just slowly catch up with pictures-yeah, mostly pictures. These are pictures of Mitchell's fourth birthday at the end of September. And as is always my style, we celebrated all week long.

Birthday morning-cake and cartoons for breakfast!

Party with friends in the park. It was a COLD day!

Mitchell and one of his best friends, Ellie

Party at Culver's with Uncle Bubba and Aunt Mandie

After opening his first video game...getting ready to play

There is never just a Mitchell...there is always a Max, too.

But he doesn't seem to mind sharing

New winter coat from grandpa and grandma

Max got a blankie too!

Opening presents with grandpa

It's February

2010-02-17T13:46:00.003-06:00

Today I decided to get back on the blogging band-wagon. It's been me just not doing it. Plain and simply. So I'm going to try to slowly update and get back to doing this in a regular basis. I figure I should since I don't scrapbook for the boys I should at least keep up the blog. Otherwise one day they will be 22 years old and I'll wonder if they were ever little because I'll have no pictures or writings to prove it.

Here are a couple of their sayings from lately.

When Mitchell wakes up in the morning with messy hair, he calls it his "pet rooster" instead of a rooster-tail. (Which also might be funny...I don't know for sure. That's what we always called it when I was growing up!)

Max has been asking for "rabbit-oli" lately instead of ravioli. It's so funny that I can't bear to correct him.

Max picks up anything that resembles a phone and says, "Hed-wo?" (His version of hello. And then he proceeds to have an entire conversation with the person on the other end and always finishes by saying, "okay bye. I lub (love) you, too!"

Max has a collection of invisible monsters that are 4 inches tall and they are "nice" monsters. The other day was tragic because we forgot them at school. Max had the saddest face and the poutiest lip and asked me, "Momma, how could you forget my MONSTERS?" I wanted to say, "well, I didn't see them," but that didn't seem appropriate for some reason. Go figure. The next day he had some invisible kids that I forgot to take along to HyVee. He had the biggest alligator tears, and said to me, "But Mommy, those are my KIDS! They will be sad and LONELY!" Oh my WORD. There is never a dull moment around here.

It's time for me to play with Mitchell. He just told me, "Mom, you are ALWAYS trying to get a few things done. I wish you wouldn't be so busy with that all the time." Point taken. Ta-ta for now.

Random updates

2009-12-20T23:09:00.003-06:00

It is so sad that I have not posted for so long. I don't know where the time goes. But I do need to catch up now that we have some sort of order to our lives again. We have been living in our house for six weeks and it is AMAZING. We love everything about it. The boys love having space to play and run, and I just love having space. Everywhere.

Mitchell and Maxwell are two peas in a pod these days. They are still sharing a room here...not because they have to, but because they want to. We also want to foster a close brother relationship, and sharing a room seems like a good way to do that. The basement is all theirs (except for the laundry room and my studio). It's officially the "kid-zone." Which means that the upstairs is all ours. Of course, we let them up here to eat. Ha ha. Really we spend a lot of time in all parts of the house, but the boys would say the toy room is there favorite. I can't decide between the kitchen or the attached garage. Or the extra bathroom. Or the fireplace. I guess I love it all. God is SO amazing. He has blessed us with this home and we just pray that we can use it for his glory every day!

I do have a studio in this house. I can just leave it set up all of the time and close the door when I'm not using it. It's pretty nice. I have lots of pictures of the boys, but right now I'll just post a few. They are such good sports when it comes to letting me practice my photography on them.

Lay 'em down

2009-10-30T15:10:00.001-05:00

Big Changes

2009-10-22T22:45:00.002-05:00

I have not posted pictures of Mitchell's birthday...for many reasons! It's CRAZY around here. We have been working for what seems like most of the summer on the rental house and doing all kinds of projects getting it ready to sell. We put it on the market September 9 and it sold on September 10. There were a few things that Brian had to fix after the inspection, but nothing too major.

Then, on October 6, we found a house, fell in love and bought it. Which meant that we had to kick it into high gear to get our house ready for the market. We had it on the market by Friday, October 9 at 5:00 p.m. It sold on Tuesday October 13. Three days on the market...WHEW! It was inspected by Friday October 16 (the same day we closed on our rental house) and only a very minor repair was needed ($5.00 and some of Brian's time).

In the mean time, I did candid shots at a friend's wedding, had about 20 photo sessions and I started babysitting once in a while to help a friend out, Brian and my brother and dad and then Brian and his Dad re-roofed this house. We moved tons of things into storage at a friend's house, cleaned like crazy and our dear family and friends came and helped us fill nail holes, paint, clean and move stuff so that our house would be ready to show. I can't express how much I appreciate everything that everyone has done to help us. The poor boys have gotten passed around from place to place during this, but again, we're so thankful to friends and family who helped us out with the boys so that we could get the house ready.

I know this is a mumble-jumble of words, but that's about how I feel right now. Everything seems crazy and out of control, but yet, by the way that everything has worked out, I know that GOD is in control of everything. He has led us this whole way and I have no doubt that he will remain faithful through the journey. I'm so excited to see what he has in store for us with this house He led us to! I'm sure that it will be an amazing journey because everything in our lives up to this point has been an amazing journey with the fingerprints of GOD all over everything.

We move into our new house on November 6...only 2 weeks away! And we close on this house on November 12 or 13, I can't remember which.

So, the blog is behind, and I can't wait for normalcy to return to our lives and be able to post regularly again. It just seems that time slips away and another day comes and goes and pretty soon a month is gone. I can't wait to see what surprises the next month holds.

Mitchell' sBirthday

2009-10-05T08:12:00.002-05:00

We had a GREAT time celebrating Mitchell's birthday this year. I cannot believe that little guy is 4 years old. 5 years ago right now we still both believed we probably wouldn't have any children of our own. And now we have 2! God is good.

Mitchell really had a birthday week and I think he loved it all. He was getting tired by the end, and said, "Okay, I think I'm done celebrating my birthday!" On Thursday, he got to bring treats to our Bible School class that we go to. He chose to bring donuts and juice boxes. He got cards from the kids and they sang "Happy Birthday!"

We baked a cake that afternoon-chocolate-with homemade frosting. Mitchell decorated it with an ENTIRE bottle of sprinkles. He got to bring that to pre-school on Friday and share it with his class. For his special day, he got to be the line leader and also got a treat and a gift out of the birthday box at school. They kids must have liked the cake because the pan was nearly empty when he brought it home!

Saturday was his actual birthday, and he started the day off by eating cake for breakfast (a tradition that I grew up with) and then opening presents. We spent the morning playing with all of his presents and helping daddy outside. We met uncle Bubba and Aunt Mandie for lunch at Culver's. Mitchell's choice. We all got to have yummy custard for desert. Mitchell's was free because it was his birthday, Max's was free with a coupon from his kid's meal, and we got another free one because we had a 5" long french fry! On the spur of the moment, we decided to go to Brian and Mandie's new place (about an hour away) for dinner (or supper, whatever you prefer) at Red Robin. Mitchell got ANOTHER free dessert and singing from the wait staff.

Sunday we had his party at the park with all of our friends. It was cold and windy, but we still enjoyed the 2 more cakes that I baked and good fellowship. By Sunday night, the boys were wiped out and I believe they were in bed by 7:15!

Max wants to keep celebrating, because he keeps saying, "Happy Birthday, Mitchell??" And we have to tell him that the birthday celebration is over for right now. Then he says, "Happy Birthday, Max??" And again we have to be the bearer's of bad news and tell him that it's not his turn yet. Birthdays really are so much fun in this house!

I have pictures to post, but right now I don't know where they are. They will be coming when I locate them.

2009-09-17T22:43:00.004-05:00

We have new paint on our house! I can't find a "before" picture right now, but as my mom says, "some things are better if you don't remember what they looked like before!" For a quick overview, it was a dull gray and peeling horribly. It did NOT look nice.

We have wonderful neighbors that own a house painting business called Home Revolution. It was pretty fun to have them working over here and we were able to go back and forth to each other's houses during the process. We already had purple trim, and the color we chose to go with it is "dill". They also stained the deck a deep coffee brown and it looks amazing! Now we have to get the shingles done, and the front deck fixed up a bit.

This is the boys and Brian right after he got back from Amsterdam. They were SOOOO happy to see him, as was I! They boys are wearing "I love Holland" cow t-shirts and matching cow wooden-shoe slippers. So far they have to wear their slippers everywhere, especially to bed when they sleep.

All three boys have been sleeping since 8:30...and I have been working on pictures and doing laundry. I tried to touch up paint, but I got the wrong color of paint to touch up with and so I'm just trying to keep busy as to not feel overwhelmed!

Things and Stuff

2009-09-17T22:12:00.004-05:00

Brian is home from Amsterdam. Praise God! I won't say it's not an adjustment, but we are glad to have him back. He is very tired, and trying to adjust back to Central Standard Time, but hopefully after this weekend, he'll be back on track. We have had a busy couple of weeks again...and I guess it's our own doing. Somehow we want to stay less busy, but we get more and more busy!

Oh! Here's the really good news! We sold our rental house. Yep, one day on the market and only $1000 less than the asking price. Brian was in Amsterdam and I was driving down the interstate when we got the offer. I counter-offered and they accepted...I had to pull over as I was crying with thanksgiving to God. ONE DAY! Amazing. I will post some pictures...right now!

WHOOOO HOOOO!

I think it turned out pretty cute. A special thanks to our families, especially Brian and Mandie. There is NO WAY we could have turned this house around without your help. We appreciate it more than we even have words to tell you.

Along with the good...comes the bad

2009-09-08T22:00:00.004-05:00

Today has been a day from the dark parts of Hades. Well, that's harsh and there have been a lot of good things, but I'm pretty sure that I will still have tears falling from my face as I fall into bed, from pure exhaustion and a good dose of inadequacy.

Let's see...where to start. We just got back from a long weekend at Grandma and Grandpa's house yesterday at around 3:30. The boys were already suffering from severe lack of sleep at this point. We went over to the rental house to finish up a few things before we listed it this morning. Of course it took longer than we thought, and by the time we got home, it was all could do to get the kids fed and in bed before they arrived in melt-down city. Then, once they were in bed and Brian got home (he stayed later to get it all finished up over there) we had to unpack, wash and re-pack for his trip to Amsterdam (which he left for today). We came up short on socks and shirts and a few other things, so I put it on the list of things to do today.

This morning dawned and I tried to get the boys moving to get to the store to get things for Brian before he left. Mitchell was having stomach pain because he CANNOT go to the bathroom when we go to other people's houses. Max decided to be "un" potty trained today (he's been trained for a couple of weeks) and had an accident right before we were finally heading out the door. Finally we made it to the store, only to find that they were re-modeling it and I couldn't find a dang thing that I needed. We got home around noon, and whaddya know the painters show up. I'm trying to get Brian's last minute things packed, he arrived home from work and was discussing things with the painters, the boys were hungry and tired....AHHHH!

Fast forward a couple of hours. We dropped Brian off at the airport with lots of tears. The boys were NOT happy that he was leaving, but I was crying the most. I was totally overwhelmed and he was leaving for the other side of the world. We had to stop at Sam's Club because we were out of all kinds of groceries, so we get home with 20 pounds of various meats when my neighbor and her three boys show up. So far, unfolded laundry has stacked up, raw meat is on the counter, various groceries are littering the kitchen and there is now FIVE boys running around throwing toys everywhere.

I finally got supper made, cut the boys' hair-because of course tomorrow is picture day at school- and get them in bed only to have an undeniable urge to check on them about 1/2 an hour later. I walk into the room into wall of vomit odor. Mitchell had woken up from a deep sleep puking all over. This woke Max up who informed me that he had dirty pants. All the while he's running around the room saying, "Mitchell pook (puke)". To spare details, I have changed 3 sets of sheets, given two baths, scrubbed the carpet, done 2 loads of laundry and just finished cleaning up a mess from the OTHER end of Mitchell's body. I feel terrible for the poor little boy. I am sheerly exhausted and can't even imagine how I will begin to pick up our house.

So...for any of you that ever think I sugar-coat these entries...fear not! Real life happens here too!

Pre-school

2009-08-26T22:48:00.002-05:00

Mitchell and his stuffed animal that he brought along, and Max with his blankie

"I'm all ready for school, Mom."

When we picked him up after school, he came running to me and almost knocked me over with a huge hug! It was great. He's holding the treat Max picked out for him while we were out and about.

New things

2009-08-26T14:57:00.002-05:00

It's shaping up to be a busy week at our house. Today I took Mitchell to pre-school for the first day and I'll be the first to tell you that I did NOT like it. I didn't want to take him, or drop him off or leave him there. He, however, LOVED it and when he was done he couldn't talk fast enough to tell me everything that had happened. It was so cute to see him get in line with his class. He had his spikey mohawk, and a huge red back pack on his back. His teacher asked them all to bring a favorite stuffed animal to share with the class (BRILLIANT) so he had a giant teddy bear under his arm. I cried all the way out to the van and for about 15 minutes after I dropped him off. However, I had a great time hanging out with Max. It's not something we usually get to do. We went shopping for a new comforter for him, and then we came home and he played and chatted with me while I was cleaning.

Also, earlier this week, we found some bunk beds on craigslist for a great deal. Matresses included. We used our hard-earned garage sale money to buy them for the boys. OH MY GOODNESS...I have never seen two little boys so excited in all of my life. It was the best night I could imagine. We took them home and immediately set them up. We made a quick run to KMART to get some sheets (Thomas sheets, of course) and matress pads. They slept in them that night. We put away Max's crib-which we converted into a toddler bed over a year ago, but it still had the essence of a crib. I was more emotional about that than I thought I would be as well. Ugggghhh...this growing up stuff is tough.

And finally, we are done with diapers this week. Max pretty much finished potty training a couple of days ago and now will ONLY wear his elmo underwear. So it's a good thing...and it's sad at the same time. No more crib, no more diapers, the paci's been gone for a while and now Mitchell is in pre-school. I officially have no more babies in the house. All of this hit me much harder than I was expecting, and at the same time I feel so proud of those boys. Go figure!

And now I'm 29

2009-08-12T23:16:00.003-05:00

My sweet husband gave me the day off for my 29th birthday. I got a massage, and a hair cut/color. Yay for change!

More Bemidji

2009-07-23T23:48:00.006-05:00

Mitchell with Grand Uncle Gary (Mom's oldest brother) and a kitty. The kitty won him over.

Aunt Lyn

Great Grandpa Gerrit making a face to make the boys laugh.

More scenry. I liked how the boat was right in the reflection of the sun.

Getting ready for a bonfire and s'mores.

Mitchell told Uncle Gary to smile for the camera and he tried so hard not to...

The highlight of the trip; driving the boat!

"Ahhhh! Mitchell's driving! Someone save us!"

Brian and the boys were up early one morning looking at the fish by the dock

The boys were still in their pajamas. I LOVE this picture. These are the men I would give my life for!!

Trip to Bemidji

2009-07-23T23:43:00.004-05:00

Brian, Mix n' Match and Great Grandpa Gerrit

Scenery

Calendar 2010

Max relaxing in loads of swimming gear.

Husband Brian showed me up on the skis. He's quite good. Who knew?

Mom and Dad. That was awesome.

Brother Brian and Mandie

Brother Brian and I

Mommy and Max on the tube.

This is home to me

2009-07-23T23:03:00.006-05:00

I don't do many landscape pictures because I'm not that emotionally attached to many pieces of land. But I thought I needed to try it when I was back home because I really do love it there. Many people say negative things about growing up in a small community, but I am one of the people who really did like being more than just a face in the crowd. And it is beautiful to me. It is close to my heart and these pictures make me feel a little closer to home when I feel like I'll just get lost in the crowd somewhere. These places are my places and they are home to me!

These are the days

2009-07-18T10:05:00.004-05:00

Today as Brian was leaving with the boys for "boy" day, Mitchell turned around and said to me, "Do you think you'll be okay here all by yourself, Mom?" I assured him that "Yes, I'll be okay, buddy," and it was only after I assured him that he finally got excited to go out with daddy!

Yesterday as Brian was leaving to go back to work after lunch, Mitchell said, "Well, it was nice seeing you again, Daddy!" We were almost rolling with laughter.

The other night, Mitchell was pitching a fit before bedtime because he was over-tired. The next morning, he came into our room and said (AND I QUOTE THIS WORD FOR WORD) "I'm sorry I was being contrary last night, Mommy and Daddy. I just needed more sleep." I was impressed. That's something I didn't learn about myself until I was probably 26!

Yesterday we had Jill (our SIL) over at our house. I had chips out for lunch and Emerald (1 year) ate one and pulled a face. Mitchell said, "Aunt Jill, I can ASSURE you that she doesn't like corn chips."

And as for Max, well, that little sweetie can be full of the dickens. Lately he likes to jump off of the back of the couch...but if someone is in his way (sitting ON the couch, for instance) he will say, "'Scuse me, please," before he jumps. Yes, this is an activity I discourage for obvious reasons.

He's also into matching. He can play the memory card game better then Mitchell or myself and it astounds me! He is learning so many new words and is always saying something hilarious. He asks, "Where Daddy go?" about 27 times a day. I usually say, "He's at work." But sometimes I'll throw in a little something else, like "Oh, he's at the zoo?" Max says, "WHY?" and then he'll say, "NOOOOOO, Mommy. Daddy work." He's at a very fun stage right now.

Ahhh Summer

2009-07-18T09:55:00.002-05:00

Even though the weather is not really cooperating, we are having summer. It's been good and busy, even though I thought summers were supposed to be lazy and relaxing. The boys and I went up to Mom and Dad's for a week last week. It was nice to have some help with the boys and to see old friends. Best of all was spending time at the place I still call "home".

Mitchell and Max took swimming lessons during the coldest, rainiest week of the season. They were parent/child swimming lessons, so Brian and I had to get in the water with them! It was freezing and rainy, but they are MUCH less afraid of the water now. They are beach babies and beg to go swimming all of the time. Lately it's only been in the 70's, but the pools here are heated.

Over the 4th of July, we went to stay with my aunt and uncle in Bemidji. They have a lake house and their boat is docked right in their back yard. It was a great time! We spent a lot of time on the water (skiing and tubing) and a lot of time just boating, sitting by the fire and watching fireworks. I finally convinced myself, at 28 years old, that I cannot ski. I have tried it and failed many times in my life, and the 4th was NO exception. I was convinced I could do it (being older and more mature) and nope...I ate the lake quite a few times before I turned in the rope and climbed, defeated, into the boat. Oh well.

Today, Brian took the boys out for a "boys" day. I am having some Denae time...this rarely happens and I was starting to feel the effects of it. I think they'll be back around naptime, but for now, I just may sit and look at the ceiling ALL BY MYSELF.

Brian and Mandie's dwelling

2009-06-16T22:10:00.002-05:00

I have only a few pictures of the work that's been/being done on the other house, currently being referred to as Brian and Mandie's house. They have been working very hard (a little too hard...slow down guys!) and our families have come many times to help us try to get it in decent shape again. It's a little hard to fix it up YET AGAIN, as we've already put a lot of blood and sweat into it the first three times. And our realtor told us pretty specifically that a house in that price range will rarely sell to homeowners who will love and cherish it. And that is why it makes it a little hard to always do things the right way instead of just doing something to get it done, but there are a lot of people learning a lot of things from this little project. Maybe God has different plans for that little house. I hope it blesses Brian and Mandie the same way it blessed us when we lived there.

Spray Park

2009-06-16T15:45:00.006-05:00

Mitchell got a new (used) bike from Grandpa Glenn and Grandma Carol. It is a pretty big bike for a three-year old, but he whips around on that thing like it's no one's business!

Auntie Annie and Max at the spray park.

Annie, Mitchell and Maxwell.

Mitchell loves his goggles, but not usually to wear IN the water.

Annie with the boys' swim hat on.

I guess he decided to wear his goggles in the water after all.

Max's Birthday!

2009-06-15T22:31:00.007-05:00

I'm finally posting some pictures from Max's birthday party celebrations.

Opening presents at Grandpa and Grandma Matherly's house. They also took him to visit Great-Grandpa Henry on that evening.

The boys and I are trying out the new piano that Grandma Matherly gave us. This was at about 11 p.m. after I had been in the car all day. We were kind of tired. (But the piano is AWESOME and we love it! Thank you, Mom Matherly)

The party at the hotel with Aunts, Uncles, Cousins and Papa and G'ma Wittmeier.

The only way Mitchell will enter the water is with TONS of floating equipment on.

The men showing me their "best side." They deserve to get this published because as soon as they saw the camera, they turned around on purpose.

That's better.

Abi with her life-jacket on backwards.

Nick

Brian, this is only funny to you. (and to all the other people who know my embarrassing story!)

Hanging out in the room after swimming.

Blowing bubbles with Papa.

Presents!

Family Party at Chuck E. Cheese

Elmo Cake

Hot Air Balloon Races

2009-06-15T19:28:00.003-05:00

On Saturday we took some time out to go to the Hot Air Balloon Races. The boys were giddy with excitement! And we bumped into an old roommate of Brian's. It was great to visit with Mark and his wife, Leann. Their girls are almost the exact same age as our boys and they were immediately friends.

Max was SO excited he could not contain himself.

Excitement dance

"Mom, look at that cool balloon behind me!"

"WHOA!"

Ellie

One of the boys' favorite balloons

Chole

"Mom LOOK!"

The boys sat in the stroller while the girls pushed. Hmmm...

Random June pictures

2009-06-15T14:26:00.004-05:00

Mitchell playing on the giant piano at the Pavillion.

Auntie Annie climbing the rock wall at the Pavillion.

Max is watching a train. Trains are his current love. (and trucks and cookies!)

This is the day Max wore snow boots with his swimming trunks.

Max and Mommy on the couch having cuddle time in the morning.

Baptism/Graduation

2009-06-13T23:37:00.005-05:00

We went to Michigan for Sarah's graduation from seminary and for Sophia's (our niece) baptism. We really wanted to go to Erick's graduation from college in Chicago the weekend before, but if you read the previous post, you know why that didn't work out. Erick was very gracious about it though, and I think we probably got to spend more time with him when we stayed over in Chicago on the way to Michigan than we would have during graduation time.

Brian's mom, Sarah, Annie, Brian's Dad, Sophia, Lexi

Grandpa and Sophia

A mini-shower for Sarah and Justin (mostly for Sophia!)
Warm sunshine, full stomach, lots of hours in the car= a sleey Brian
Mitchell and Lexi playing in the sand
Getting ready for baptism
Justin, Sarah and Sophia
The baptism
Presenting the baby to the congregation

Uncle Erick...awwwww
The family. My boys were quite tired. I'm not actually sure if they are fully recovered even now!

Trip to Michigan

2009-06-13T23:24:00.006-05:00

Here are some pictures of our trip to Michigan. It was a quick trip, but it was worth it. We have logged A LOT of hours in the car in the last few months. I estimate between 80-90 hours. The boys are ready to be home for a while.

2 months

2009-06-13T23:00:00.005-05:00

Well folks, I have a lot of catching up to do. I can't even begin to tell you what the last 2 months have been like around here, but I'm going to post a lot of photos. They won't be in order of sequence, but at least they'll get posted. I have to admit, I'm kind of glad to be finally starting to enjoy summer. I am looking forward to things slowing down a bit.

Brief Rundown

April- I dropped the boys off in Pella and then continued on to Grand Rapids, Michigan to see my new niece and hopefully provide some moral support my my "new mommy" sister-in-law. Brian flew to Las Vegas for work during this week.

Total time in the car-30 hours

We took possession of the rental house once again and found it trashed from top to bottom.

We celebrated Maxwell's 2nd birthday after we got home from our trips. Then my grandparents, mom, aunt, uncle and cousin stayed here on the way to Maggie's graduation.

Brian's aunt died and he traveled to the Pella area for her funeral.

My family stopped again here on their way home. Brian (brother) and Mandie also flew up for the weekend and stayed at our house. We spent Saturday gutting the rental house.

We decided to make the trip to Pella the next weekend for Tulip Time because "life is short." More time in the car.

My younger brother from California called and told us he got laid off from his job. They decided to move into our rental house.

It was in BAD shape, so Mom and Dad came down the next day and helped us lay carpet, and laminate flooring and clean, clean, clean. Then my friend Alicia came over and helped me paint rooms. In 1 1/2 days we were over at the rental house for about 25 out of 36 hours, going home only to sleep. We also cancelled half of our vacation at that time.

Thursday of that week, we drove again to Grand Rapids, Michigan for the baptism of our niece and to celebrate Sarah and Erick's graduation. While we were gone, my dad flew to California to help Brian and Mandie pack and drive the moving truck back. They arrived to live in the "not yet completed but liveable" rental house.

My sister-in-law and her kids came a few days later to help them unpack and move in. I cooked for the crew of 9 because I know what it's like to try to cook and move at the same time! :) After Jill left, Brian's dad called and said he had the next weekend open to come and help us re-roof the rental house. We did NOT want to turn down his help.

Wednesday of that week the doctor found a heart murmur in our Maxwell and we had to immediately schedule an eckocardiogram for Friday morning. Later that night my dad called to tell me he was in the hospital with an infection in his leg from an injury he got while he was here laying carpet.

Thursday Glenn and Annie arrived, and Brian, Brian, Mandie, and Glenn worked on the house all day Friday and got most of the new roof put on. This weekend the Brian's put new windows in the house because 2 of the old ones were smashed. During this whole time I have mostly been the chuck-wagon (meals on wheels) for everyone, child-care and the gopher. I have made a lot of trips to Menard's!

It has been crazy. I have large black circles under both of my eyes from stress and lack of sleep. But I want to thank our parents...there is no way we would have the stuff in the other house done that we have done right now without all of your hard work. My dad laid carpet for the entire house in ONE day! The guys shingled almost the whole house in ONE day! Amazing. And thanks also to Brian and Mandie who are doing TONS of work while they live there.

Phew. I didn't realize everything that had been going on until I wrote it down. Oh, and my dad's leg FINALLY cleared up after about a week and a half and 4 days of IV's and Max's eckocardiogram came back normal. Praise God. By the way, I LOVE having my brother and Mandie living 4 blocks away. I know it won't last, so we're enjoying it while it does!

From the cuteness archives

2009-06-11T22:36:00.002-05:00

"Max, you are CUTE!" (Me)
"No, Daddy's CUTE!" (Max)

"Mom, that poopy was like a huge potato." (Mitchell)
(sorry, I should have omitted this, but it was hilarious)

"More choco-milk?" (Max one night at 2 a.m. standing next to my bed)

"Mom, what kind of dress do you think God has on right now?" (Mitchell)
"Well, to be honest, I don't know what kind of clothes God wears." (Me)
"Me too, but they sure must be big. It would makes things a lot easier if we could just see God." (Mitchell)

"What if I have a scary dream tonight?" (Mitchell)
"We could pray to Jesus to ask him to help you not have scary dreams." (Me)
"Mom (with a superior tone) Jesus is not the one that does everything. God is." (Mitchell)

"Dear God, I know you made Mom the boss of me, but could you please change her back so that I can be the boss?" (Mitchell)

"Higer, Higher, Higher!!" (Max whenever he's on the swing. He wants to touch the clouds apparently)

The other day Max pulled Mitchell's hair. I went over and said, "Max HENRY!" He said, "Mawx, time ooout," and went and sat on the stairs. Man, it's tough to remain upset when they do that.

Time Flies

2009-06-11T22:09:00.002-05:00

Ahhhhhh!!!! I don't know how in the world I got to this point in my life when I barely have time to breathe, let alone blog about it. It's just insane, really. Every single stage I'm at in life, I think to myself, "It really can't get much busier than this." And then we enter the next stage and I am thrown against the wall with the force of the gravity because I'm spinning around so fast.

When we had Mitchell, I was convinced that having a baby was the biggest change of my life. All of a sudden our life was no longer our own, but we had to be at the beck and call of this tiny person. I thought I was SO FAR behind on sleep. And I thought I had NO TIME to do anything. I was SO WRONG!

Then we had our Max! Running around after a 19 month old and a brand new baby was amazingly insane. I don't know if it was just me or what, but I have lately heard people with kids as close as ours say, "Oh yeah, it's no big deal." WHAT?!?!?! I ran from morning until night and was awake most of the night only to start over again the next day. I think I had permenant purple bags under my eyes that were big enough to fit my groceries for the week. I would sit down to feed Max and then Mitchell would destroy something. And just when I was finding 4 seconds to take a deep breath, someone would be at the door needing something. Then I would have two kids crying, company, a mess in the house and more than likely some exposed part of my body that shouldn't have been exposed.

And I thought that was insane. NOW we have a three-year old and a two-year old. I don't even remember how to sit, much less take the time to write a blog. I think I used to know what it was like to watch tv, but I can't really remember. I once had a membership to the gym, but I cancelled that because I thought, "Heck, I've got to put on between 10-20 miles every day." And that's just before noon. I don't remember the last time my floor was clean for more than 2 hours, and I have never had a day when there hasn't been SOMETHING in the laundry basket. And something in the washer. And something in the dryer. And a load of clothes waiting to be folded. And another load of clothes waiting to be put away. We run all day. The boys are dirty all day. I'm dirty all day. Mostly I do things in 30 second bursts. Check email, wash A dish, fold an article of clothing, wipe a nose, wash out underwear.

Ah, but then, I also get 30 second bursts of, "I love you, Mom." "I want to be like you when I grow up, Mommy." And lots of MESSY kisses. And sandy hugs. And brothers sitting on the couch saying, "We're best friends, right Mommy??"

If I think we're busy now, I can't even IMAGINE what the next stage will bring. I better go get those running shoes dusted off.

More pictures, of course

2009-05-17T15:04:00.007-05:00

These are the photos from my camera. I think the boys look pretty cute as little "Dutchies!" They wore their wooden shoes the whole time and would NOT let us take them off. The next day, Mitchell said, "Dad, those wooden shoes made my feet kind of sore!"

Brian's cousin, Morgan, was the Tulip Queen this year. It's a pretty big deal...custom made costumes and wooden shoes for her and she also has the duty of promoting Pella and Tulip Time.

She chose Brian's sister, Lexi, to be one of her flower girls. Lexi also got a custom-made outfit and had to be with the queen during all of the festivities. She got picked up for every parade (6 total) in a convertible at her front door.

Lexi and Ashley (the other flower girl) held queen Morgan's train during the ceremonies.

My naughty little Dutch boy (Maxwell) playing in the water used to scrub streets before the parade.

He refused to wear his hat with the bill to the front. I think it looked cuter this way anyway!

Erick and Amy walked with Mitchell through the "baby" parade.

My new, sweet niece, Sophia Grace.

Max got hot while being paraded around, so he modified his costume. Notice the wooden shoes and the nice "Dutch-white" legs??

Sarah and Justin with the boys getting ready to scrub streets before the final parade.

Maxwell got the hang of street scrubbing...

Mix n' Match with their cousin, Jrake.

Max got a little distracted from the task at hand. It looks like he was getting ready to whack someone.

Newsie

Tulip Time

2009-05-17T14:36:00.006-05:00

It's that time of year again...time for wooden shoes, hats, baggy pants and, of course, TULIPS! We joined the family again for Tulip Time in Pella. My mother-in-law generously had custom made costumes for each of. We get stopped by A LOT of tourists when we are there to get our pictures taken. I do wonder though, what in the world these people are going to do with all these pictures of strangers when they get home? I guess just because all four of us are dressed up and they want to remember their Tulip Time, it will be special.??. We all have Marken costumes on (province of Holland). The lady's costumes have about 20 lbs of fabric and most of it is around the middle. I think I had about 7 layers around my middle this year. I always see the pictures from Tulip time and think, "Oh good grief, I have gained weight." But then I remember that it's just all the extra fabric. At least that's what I tell myself....

Ahh, but on to the pictures. This first batch is off of my Mother-in-law's camera. The next post will be pictures from mine.

Mitchell giving auntie Lexi kisses!

More kisses!!

Sister-in-law Sarah and Justin

Brother-in-law Erick and Amy

All of us getting ready to march in the baby parade. My mother-in-law collects special old buggies particularly for this event. Mitchell was SO crabby during this time. He's the one in the middle with his hat over his face.

No, I'm not really not that fat!! :)

Baby Sophia Grace (Sarah and Justin). She was three weeks old and wore a costume that was originally made for a Cabbage Patch Doll.

Sarah, Justin and Sophia

Maxwell's Birthday

2009-05-07T14:11:00.003-05:00

I was realizing that I didn't post much about Max's birthday yet, and I wanted to do that. Birthdays are a pretty big deal in our house and his was no different. I love celebrating life! To think that my baby boy is 2 is hard to believe. I currently have not downloaded the pictures from his special day, but I will be doing that soon.

He got to have a couple of celebrations. The weekend before his birthday, my whole side of the family was here (including Bubba and Mandy!!) and we went to a hotel with a waterpark where we swam and played and then had a birthday celebration (for Max, Dad, Abi, Emerald, and Jill) with lots of food and presents.

Then for the actual day of his birthday, he celebrated with the Matherly grandparents as I was on my way back from Grand Rapids (Brian's sister just had a sweet baby girl... www.digitaldenae.blogspot.com) and Brian was on his way back from Las Vegas (for work). The visited great-grandpa Henry, ate ice-cream cake and opened presents when I got there at about 10:30 p.m.

The day after we all got home, we pretended it was his actual birthday since we didn't get to be with him on the day (it was hard on this Mommy to be away) and had a day long celebration. We had his favorite food (meat!) and cake and presents, and we sang to him. And last but not least, we spent the entire evening at Chuck E. Cheese. It was great! The boys just ran around putting tokens in machines and playing whatever games they could reach. We ended up with some great prizes...cotton candy, airhead candy, some little plastic marker thing and some stickers. All that for only 600 tickets. Someone is cashing in at that place! And of course, that is where the boys always choose to go for their birthday meal. :)

Maxwell, I love you so much! I have experienced so much joy from you in the past two years. I am thankful for every day that God has given to me to enjoy with you. You make me laugh, and you are always up for a good cuddle at the end of the day. You were the one of the best surprises I've ever gotten. I couldn't love you more and I can't wait to see what God's plans are for your future. I pray that you will grow up to be a true gentleman that serves God always.

Being their mommy....

2009-04-30T14:24:00.003-05:00

My uncle told me something this morning that I wanted to write down.

"Being their (Mitchell and Maxwell) mommy is the MOST important job you will do TODAY."

Some days I wonder what on earth I am doing. Today I went upstairs and found a whole roll of toilet paper on the floor next to the toilet. And I know it was a WHOLE roll because I just put a new on out last night. So then I went back downstairs and found Maxwell up on the counter trying to get our tetras out of the tank with his hands. He wanted to feed them, but he couldn't get the cover of the food open (Thank God) so I guess he was trying to bring the fish to the food instead of the food to the fish.

I think I spend 97% of my time disciplining and correcting and saying, "No, we don't hit our brother," or "What do you say to grandma for giving you a treat?" Please and thank-you, I'm sorry, I forgive you, I love you, No thank-you...over and over and over I train them and over and over and over they forget! I clean a room to have it immediately destroyed behind me. I have scratches on my wooden floor, black marker that I just discovered all over the walls, door frames and sides of the cabinets. My make-up always ends up in little chunks (on the floor usually) and mostly my head is just spinning. I find myself wanting to burst into random bursts of tears when I see another pile of shredding from the paper shredder all over the floor or see bubbles in the toilet from Mitchell dumping shampoo in it.

But then I remember that being a mommy is NOT glamorous, but that my boys don't love me any less if I don't have make-up on, or if there is black marker all over, or if there is never toilet paper on the roll. I remember that how I react to a situation will shape them for the rest of the days of their lives. That how I teach them to treat me will teach them how to love their wives in the future. I remember that by training them to memorize Bible verses, and to honor their elders that I am training the future leaders of this world. I am training them to be the kind of men that this world needs by making them clean up their own messes and take responsibility for their actions, whether they be good or bad.

So is it easy? No. Do I get frustrated some days? YES! Do I want to cry for a feeling of failure as a mother because I don't always know how to handle a situation? Most definitely! But would I change it? NEVER in a million years.

Yes, being their mommy is the MOST IMPORTANT JOB I HAVE TODAY. My todays are limited. They are under my wing and my protection right now. They won't be forever. I need to be their mommy right now so that I know when they strike off on their own in a few short years that I did my best to train them in the ways of the Lord so that they will choose the right paths.

Bring on the toilet paper...

New Floor

2009-04-12T23:08:00.005-05:00

This weekend we got a new floor! Thanks to my amazing dad and awesome husband! Mitchell got in on the action and helped too. I love the way it looks. It makes our house look bigger and tidier. Thanks Dad and Brian. You guys always amaze me and I'm so proud of you! Thanks also to Mom for helping me clean out the basement, do laundry, and keep the boys out of mischief. We really appreciate you.

Funny things

2009-03-29T14:37:00.002-05:00

The boys have been cracking us up lately. Max is into saying "COOKIE" just like Cookie Monster off of Sesame Street. He says it low and gravely and it's hilarious! I'll have to try to get a video of it.

He is also playing this game where everything is BLUE. If we ask him what color something is, he says, "BLUE". And then he giggles and shows those sweet dimples. He'll do it over and over as long as we keep laughing at him. I'm afraid he doesn't have much interest in learning other colors since we started this little game with him.

When we ask Mitchell a question, (i.e.- "Are you sure we should have yogurt for a snack?") he'll respond with, "Have I ever steered you wrong?" Ha.

Today he asked me to pick up something that he dropped and he said, "Well thank you, My Dear."

The other day he was in time-out and I walked by the stairs and heard him praying, "Dear God, Please help Mommy not to be so BOSSY!"

And on that note, I think I'll sign out for the day. I need to work on not being bossy. ;)

weekend at Doug and Jill's

2009-03-22T16:22:00.004-05:00

Yesterday we met my parents at Doug and Jill's house. It was SO good to see everyone again (except Bubba and Mandie...they are out living in the California sunshine and we MISS THEM!). We had a really nice day. I got a few pictures, even though they all rolled their eyes when I got out the camera. Ah well, what's a girl to do??

The kids playing on an old car (with Grandma Joan's help)

Emerald
Abi
Mitchell sporting a Northern Plains hat from Doug

Em and Papa Mike
Max's NPC hat from Uncle Doug

Interview with the kids

2009-03-20T14:49:00.002-05:00

I did this interview on Facebook with Mitchell. His answers amused me, so if you don't check Facebook, I thought I would share the interview here.

Interview with Mitchell (3 years old)

1. What is something mom always says to you?
Mitchell, do something.

2. What makes mom happy?
Kissing her and hugging her

3. What makes mom sad?
Like, not listening. That's pretty sad.

4. How does your mom make you laugh?
By tickling me!

5. What did your mom like to do when she was a child?
I do NOT know.

6. How old is your mom?
You're like, 5 days old.

7. How tall is your mom?
5 inches

8. What is her favorite thing to do?
PLAY!!

9. What does your mom do when you're not around?
Clean. She cleans.

10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?
Spankings.

11. What is your mom really good at?
She's really good at playing games

12. What is your mom not very good at?
Hitting

13. What does your mom do for her job?
Cleans. She does that for her job.
Then someday she'll grow up and feel famous!

14. What is your mom's favorite food?
Macaroni and Cheese...and tomatoes...and cucumbers...and ALSO, CUCUMBERS. That's all of it.

15. What makes you proud of your mom?
Going potty in the toilet on her own

16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?
Martha (from Martha Speaks)

17. What do you and your mom do together?
We clean-up together. We dust together. We cook together.

18. How are you and your mom the same?
When we play together

19. How are you and your mom different?
I don't know what makes me and mommy different!

20. How do you know your mom loves you?
By kisses! And by hugs! And CUPCAKES. Mmmmmm!

21. What does your mom like most about your dad?
She likes kissing him. She eats apples on him (hmmm...I'm not sure where this came from!)

22. Where is your mom's favorite place to go?
The Mall...(he says in a whisper)

More pictures, of course

2009-03-10T23:21:00.004-05:00

I LOVE my new camera. Every day I discover new things I can do with it. I also love my image editing software. GIMP is the awesomest. ;) (yep, it's a word in my own personal dictionary)

My boys get sick of modeling for me, so occasionally I have to use myself. This one turned out, so I thought I would post it.

It seems like spring...

2009-03-09T23:19:00.004-05:00

A while back we had a day of glorious weather. The boys were outside most of the day. They LOVE it outside and we can NOT wait for summer!!!

Max in his "Bomber" jacket

Mitchell pretending he's really sad!

Mom look! No SNOW!

Maxwell's football stance

Mitchell riding on his lawn tractor

Max taking his turn on the lawn tractor

I'm pretty sure the trailer isn't supposed to be used for hauling people...

From the Washington Post advice column

2009-03-09T14:36:00.002-05:00

This is great. In case any of you wonder what us "stay-at-home" moms do, check this out.

Dear Carolyn,

Best friend has child. Her: exhausted, busy, no time for self, no time for me, etc. Me (no kids): Wow. Sorry. What'd you do today? Her: Park, play group . . .

Okay. I've done Internet searches, I've talked to parents. I don't get it. What do stay-at-home moms do all day? Please no lists of library, grocery store, dry cleaners . . . I do all those things, too, and I don't do them EVERY DAY. I guess what I'm asking is: What is a typical day and why don't moms have time for a call or e-mail? I work and am away from home nine hours a day (plus a few late work events) and I manage to get it all done. I'm feeling like the kid is an excuse to relax and enjoy -- not a bad thing at all -- but if so, why won't my friend tell me the truth? Is this a peeing contest ("My life is so much harder than yours")? What's the deal? I've got friends with and without kids and all us child-free folks get the same story and have the same questions.

Tacoma, Wash.

Relax and enjoy. You're funny.

Or you're lying about having friends with kids.

Or you're taking them at their word that they actually have kids, because you haven't personally been in the same room with them.

Internet searches?

I keep wavering between giving you a straight answer and giving my forehead some keyboard. To claim you want to understand, while in the same breath implying that the only logical conclusions are that your mom-friends are either lying or competing with you, is disingenuous indeed.

So, since it's validation you seem to want, the real answer is what you get. In list form. When you have young kids, your typical day is: constant attention, from getting them out of bed, fed, clean, dressed; to keeping them out of harm's way; to answering their coos, cries, questions; to having two arms and carrying one kid, one set of car keys, and supplies for even the quickest trips, including the latest-to-be-declared-essential piece of molded plastic gear; to keeping them from un-shelving books at the library; to enforcing rest times; to staying one step ahead of them lest they get too hungry, tired or bored, any one of which produces the kind of checkout-line screaming that gets the checkout line shaking its head.

It's needing 45 minutes to do what takes others 15.

It's constant vigilance, constant touch, constant use of your voice, constant relegation of your needs to the second tier.

It's constant scrutiny and second-guessing from family and friends, well-meaning and otherwise. It's resisting constant temptation to seek short-term relief at everyone's long-term expense.

It's doing all this while concurrently teaching virtually everything -- language, manners, safety, resourcefulness, discipline, curiosity, creativity. Empathy. Everything.

It's also a choice, yes. And a joy. But if you spent all day, every day, with this brand of joy, and then, when you got your first 10 minutes to yourself, wanted to be alone with your thoughts instead of calling a good friend, a good friend wouldn't judge you, complain about you to mutual friends, or marvel how much more productively she uses her time. Either make a sincere effort to understand or keep your snit to yourself.